tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-71528517448640452872024-03-05T07:26:24.594-05:00Expedition: Fruit Possible"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control...Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit." Galatians 5:22-23,25Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.comBlogger67125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-14430942234203717862020-06-28T21:23:00.002-04:002020-07-03T06:02:03.180-04:00Comfort In the Wake of Crisis: Our Personal God<span id="docs-internal-guid-40a52d4a-7fff-28c0-5722-22800abc137e"><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I just want my husband back</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, I thought as I stomped up the road and tried to make sense of the journey we had been walking. It was day two of EMDR therapy for my husband’s PTSD and anxiety. I wasn’t seeing many improvements despite the fact that we felt like God opened every door for this counselor to work with Jared in this time.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTKBAEkTkoFSOJZMspcR8dVFS_bT0HbACrb7JUPqcQCMimFhemc5vG478M-L1UZTIohIei7JVm9_TmZl3JOnLveQ9DiRAdP4ZpkVvkA8oTwcyVcN1iEyqpIMhS0_SY_Bc037LYmYhCm1nu/s1920/girl-1245678_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1281" data-original-width="1920" height="419" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTKBAEkTkoFSOJZMspcR8dVFS_bT0HbACrb7JUPqcQCMimFhemc5vG478M-L1UZTIohIei7JVm9_TmZl3JOnLveQ9DiRAdP4ZpkVvkA8oTwcyVcN1iEyqpIMhS0_SY_Bc037LYmYhCm1nu/w625-h419/girl-1245678_1920.jpg" width="625" /></a></div><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span><p></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I was fuming. I was exhausted from the roller coaster of emotion. I was weary of carrying the load for our family for the past eight weeks. I was done with the fear over whether my husband might be up all night again, have another panic attack, and leave me to provide for myself and our six sons while he was on medical sabbatical from work. To top it all off, in the midst of his crisis, our family had downsized and moved into a smaller house. Stress was eating me. Anger rose in my soul. It was all so unfair.</span></p><h1 dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 20pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 400; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Sanctuary</span></h1><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Four blocks down the road, I saw a steeple. Making a beeline for that church, I ached for a sense of closeness to God; my heart felt so abandoned. I looked up at that cross with tears in my eyes. “Do you even see me? Do you even care?” I slowly circled through the path in the courtyard and around the front of the building. Feeling lost in the shadows, I stepped back to the brick wall up front and sat down.</span></p><h1 dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 20pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 400; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">This Crisis</span></h1><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">This crisis wasn’t something I asked for. I never expected this would happen to us. My husband was the strong one. Sure, he had experienced and seen hard things in his career as a morgue assistant and now as a paramedic firefighter, but he handled it well. Or so I thought. Until one day, the life stress of our move, our overcommitment, the unexpected death of his grandfather, and a tough call at work all piled up and sent him into a crisis of adrenaline overdrive, insomnia, panic, and anxiety.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Eight weeks had passed—weeks of chaos, unknowns, kids being shipped to caregivers and back home because of daddy’s instability, not knowing when the next wave of panic might hit or how hard. Would he be present? Or would he get that distant look in his eyes, turn inward, and need me to help him through the struggle?</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Finding him curled up in the corner shaking in fear terrified me. Hearing him wrestle with dark thoughts, hopelessness, and brief thoughts of suicidal escape had </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">me</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> near panic, but I knew</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> I </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">couldn’t be weak. I had to hold it all together. Would we get through this? Would he be able to return to work? Would I ever feel safe or protected or able to be vulnerable again?</span></p><h1 dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 20pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 400; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Strange Juxtaposition</span></h1><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I sat on that brick wall, gazing at the ornately carved church doors. The building rang of history, being near one hundred twenty years old. I imagined the people coming to seek God, to draw close. The strange juxtaposition of my heart surprised me. I was angry at God for forcing my hand, as it seemed to me, down this path of mental illness. I wanted to yell at God. I wanted to scream out how I felt so abandoned, so alone. And at the same moment, I wanted to collapse weeping into His loving arms. I needed Him to hold me. I needed to feel His nearness like I never have before. I needed to know it was all going to be okay.</span></p><h1 dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 20pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 400; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Lead me to the Cross</span></h1><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I felt a nudge in my heart and a tune float through my head. I pulled my phone out of my back pocket, and quickly looked up Hillsong UNITED </span><a href="https://www.worshiptogether.com/songs/lead-me-to-the-cross-united/" style="text-decoration-line: none;"><span style="color: #1155cc; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; text-decoration-line: underline; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Lead me to the Cross”</span></a><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Savior I come</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">. Yes, I was ready to come. I couldn’t do this on my own anymore.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Quiet my soul, remember. </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I felt a hush grow over my heart as I focused my eyes on that cross high above my head. Yes, I needed to remember.</span></p><h1 dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 20pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 400; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Getting Personal</span></h1><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Throughout my husband’s crisis, I had been forced to run to Jesus like I never had before. Growing up in a Christian home, I could recite verses about so many truths on God’s character, his consistency, his comfort. But even though I knew these verses intellectually, I hadn’t personalized them.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Woven in and out of the Epistles, a special word is used numerous times - “knowledge.” This word is “gnosis” in Greek and means personal and experiential knowledge (See </span><a href="https://biblehub.com/ephesians/3-19.htm" style="text-decoration-line: none;"><span style="color: #1155cc; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; text-decoration-line: underline; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Ephesians 3:19</span></a><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, </span><a href="https://biblehub.com/colossians/1-10.htm" style="text-decoration-line: none;"><span style="color: #1155cc; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; text-decoration-line: underline; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Colossians 1:10</span></a><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, </span><a href="https://biblehub.com/2_peter/1-3.htm" style="text-decoration-line: none;"><span style="color: #1155cc; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; text-decoration-line: underline; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">2 Peter 1:3</span></a><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">). This form of knowing was not simply passed down information from one person to another. It wasn’t simply understanding or even believing. It went even deeper than that. This knowing was where the rubber met the road, where the truths in God’s word went from words on a page that I chose to believe to words that the Holy Spirit made personal to me. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">In the darkest of moments, when my husband would cycle his thoughts, pacing through the house in a panic, I would find myself curled up in my chair with tears streaming down my face crying out to Jesus. </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Hold me, Papa. My husband can’t right now. I am so scared. I feel so alone. </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I would just sit. I would be still. I would be held. And the Holy Spirit would whisper to my heart. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You are never alone! You are never alone! </span><a href="https://biblehub.com/isaiah/41-10.htm" style="text-decoration-line: none;"><span style="color: #1155cc; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; text-decoration-line: underline; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You are never alone!</span></a></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And when my husband would feel threatened and be afraid of personal threat, I would feel frightened too. Again, I would curl up asking Jesus to hold me. </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Papa, I’m scared. My husband is scared. I don’t feel safe. </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And Jesus would comfort me.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You are always safe! You are always safe! </span><a href="https://biblehub.com/isaiah/41-10.htm" style="text-decoration-line: none;"><span style="color: #1155cc; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; text-decoration-line: underline; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You are always safe!</span></a></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">When the journey continued over the course of days and weeks with no end in sight, I cried out to Jesus and asked how long I must endure. </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Will this never end? Is there even hope? </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And Jesus whispered tenderly.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">There is always hope. There is always hope. </span><a href="https://biblehub.com/ephesians/1-18.htm" style="text-decoration-line: none;"><span style="color: #1155cc; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; text-decoration-line: underline; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">There is always hope! </span></a></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Those three statements became what I clung to in the following weeks leading up to the EMDR therapy. God had gotten personal with me, reminding me that he was a personal God and that his truths were true for me too! </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I am never alone! I am always safe! There is always hope!</span></p><h1 dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 20pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 400; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">New Truth</span></h1><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">In this moment, I heard His gentle whisper once again. </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Remember, Hannah. You are never alone! You are always safe! There is hope! </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Yet I felt like there was more God wanted to make personal in this moment.</span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">He pointed his finger at my heart. I valued justice, and in my anger, I wanted my husband to know how deeply he had wounded me. Jesus gently reminded me that He is the one who judges justly, and that all would give an account one day – my husband for the mistakes he made and myself for the ways I chose to hold onto anger and bitterness. But there was another option. </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Hannah, entrust your journey to me. Justice will be done!</span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">All of the pain, all of the tears and sorrow, all of the fears, all of the ways I had given (and many of the ways I had not), they were not forgotten. God had been present each moment of this crisis, each moment of my life. And I could rest in the fact that in eternity, all would come to light. Each will be rewarded according to what he has done. My efforts were not in vain. Even if my husband didn’t see what I had done, even if he never said thank you, even if I felt taken for granted for the rest of my life, God knew. When I felt the certainty of the unfairness of it all, I could rest in the fact that God greatly valued the suffering I was experiencing, and one day if I remained faithful and trusted my just judge, all would be made right!</span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Justice will be done! There is hope! You are always safe! You are never alone!</span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">My friends, I pray that God will make himself known (gnosis) personally to you, wherever you are, whatever your struggle. May the Lord bless you and keep you, may He be gracious to you and turn his face toward you, and may He give you peace. Amen and Amen!</span></p><br /><br /></span><script src="http://assets.pinterest.com/js/pinit.js" type="text/javascript"></script>Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-26482729298741616542020-06-01T13:06:00.001-04:002020-06-01T13:06:52.492-04:00Christian Community: Being the Arms of Jesus to a Friend in Crisis<span id="docs-internal-guid-d4c1023d-7fff-55e0-0e80-4b2c5d7fbba4"><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">*This is a post I wrote about how others ministered to our family during my husband’s struggle with PTSD. Right now, our culture is volatile. People are hurting. They are wondering who will listen, who will love them, who will see them. We have a choice as believers to surround those who are hurting and feeling so misunderstood. We have an opportunity to reach out like never before to stand against injustice and to demonstrate the love of our gentle, peace-making Savior! The situation of our family’s crisis and the circumstances surrounding racism and injustice are not the same; however, the principles of how to care for people who are hurting remain constant. Facing racism and injustice can elicit its own crisis situations, and prolonged exposure to dehumanizing treatment can be its own form of PTSD.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimK1KfZshPWCxMfCi-7IlO75WrWBBWD8EAjnRifonZZEs7GlHtJwj09ifRQNYF4LyAPXetk7ptMes2oQNbKeJ3ImXa-hHo197uA0CHmEfqt_ec3M8imarBhQVoMWjyo1622Pzr0YBsWbRm/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1280" data-original-width="1920" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimK1KfZshPWCxMfCi-7IlO75WrWBBWD8EAjnRifonZZEs7GlHtJwj09ifRQNYF4LyAPXetk7ptMes2oQNbKeJ3ImXa-hHo197uA0CHmEfqt_ec3M8imarBhQVoMWjyo1622Pzr0YBsWbRm/w640-h426/guy-2617866_1920.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span><p></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">November 2019: My husband experienced a PTSD crisis that rocked our world. After the initial night of constant terror, anxiety, panic and insomnia, I was lost at how to move forward, what to do, who to call. </span><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">What were we going to do with our six boys? How were we going to find help?</span><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Thankfully, we were connected to some friends who are counselors, and by the grace of God, we were able to contact them for wisdom in the middle of the night. In the days to follow, we saw the body of Christ step up in ways like we’ve never experienced before. We witnessed a beautiful picture of how Christ uses his church to meet needs by each using their own gifts. The following are some ways we were blessed.</span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">If you have a friend who is experiencing pain or facing crises and you don’t know how to help, here are some places to start helping them feel the arms of Jesus!</span></p><br /><h1 dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 6pt; margin-top: 20pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 20pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 400; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Listen</span></h1><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It seems this should go without saying, but the greatest gift some of our friends gave us during the crisis was the gift of listening. In The </span><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Grief-Recovery-Handbook-Anniversary-Expanded/dp/0061686077" style="text-decoration-line: none;"><span style="color: #1155cc; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; text-decoration-line: underline; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Grief Recovery Handbook</span></a><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, John James explains that the listener should picture themselves as a heart with ears. Listen to understand. One of my best friends offered her ears on a “whenever needed” basis. I felt the freedom to call her when I was overwhelmed, when I had questions, and when I just needed to vent. She didn’t allow my strong emotions to threaten her, but routinely asked a simple question, “What do you need from me right now?” This allowed me to be honest about whether I just needed a sounding board or if I needed someone to help me brainstorm and think through a situation.</span></p><h1 dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 6pt; margin-top: 20pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 20pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 400; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Allow Room</span></h1><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Mental health crises are unpredictable. Both the one in crisis and the caregiver may experience a broad range of emotions. Know that there is not a one-size-fits-all predictable pattern that will be followed. Allow your friend room to feel -- whether it is anxiety, fear, frustration, anger, sadness, worry, or even panic. Know that feelings don’t have a permanent staying power, but can typically be expressed and released. Honor the feelings that your friend is experiencing. The significance of an event is in the perception of the receiver. Please don’t try to stamp your perspective on their suffering. </span></p><h1 dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 6pt; margin-top: 20pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 20pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 400; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Don’t Judge</span></h1><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Even being in the medical profession, I struggled with my perspective on mental health until I experienced it personally. It’s easy to think that if someone just had better life management or a stronger prayer life that they wouldn’t experience these struggles. Our counselor helped us to see the light when they explained that God created us integrated beings with a mind, will, and emotions along with our bodies. Our minds and emotions can only handle so much before they need a break, and if we haven’t learned to listen to them they eventually override all physical and mental processes in order to have their needs met. Anyone can reach a breaking point. It is not your friend’s fault. It’s simply the ways they have been taught and empowered to care for, or not care for, their being as a whole. With a rare exception, most people do the best they can with the information they have been given.</span></p><h1 dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 6pt; margin-top: 20pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 20pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 400; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Don’t Preach</span></h1><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">As we were journeying through this crisis, the most discouraging “help” we received were people who thought they were offering wisdom from God’s Word. Don’t get me wrong. God’s Word is living and active and powerful! But in the heat of a crisis, the brain cannot process on a logical level because the lower brain has hijacked everything else. Trying to encourage your friend to “count it all joy” or to “cast all their cares on Jesus” may very well push buttons of failure, making your friend feel like they once again don’t measure up and heaping guilt on an already overwhelmed soul. There will come a time for speaking truth, but in the crux of a crisis it may do more harm than good.</span></p><h1 dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 6pt; margin-top: 20pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 20pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 400; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Encourage Them to Seek Help</span></h1><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Sometimes a crisis extends beyond our area of expertise. When my husband was awake all night long with fear and panic, I knew we needed to find a way to help him sleep. We sought the help of our counselor friend, took a trip to the ER, and spoke with our family doctor. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">If your friend is struggling with sleeping, with being overcome by panic, or with maintaining daily routines and engaging in life, encourage them to see a counselor or their doctor. Sometimes, this conversation can be difficult, and the timing has to be right for your friend to accept your suggestion. Medications can be a tremendous help in calming the body systems so that someone can learn the skills they need to keep their emotions and mind in a healthy place. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">If your friend shows signs or talks about harming themselves or others, seek help right away. If the counselor or doctor’s office is not open, you can always go to the ER or call the</span><a href="https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/" style="text-decoration-line: none;"><span style="color: #1155cc; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; text-decoration-line: underline; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> National Suicide </span></a><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Lifeline which is available 24/7.</span></p><h1 dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 6pt; margin-top: 20pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 20pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 400; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Offer (Sometimes Insist) Practical Help</span></h1><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">One of my major concerns when we were first faced with the crisis was what I was going to do with my six sons while I was caring for my husband. We have some close friends that took them for the day while we pursued medical help. They wound up keeping them overnight and ultimately opened their home to our sons for as long as necessary to see my husband on a healthy path. For a week, my boys were loved on by our friends and family while we tried to reach a stable point. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Our Church body really stepped up at this time. We were in the midst of selling our home. We had projects to complete and boxes to pack. Ladies brought meals and helped pack boxes and clean our home. Men helped us complete the projects, take care of the yard, and loaded the trucks. We saw the people of God using their gifts to serve us, and we felt the love of Jesus through their help.</span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">When someone is in a crisis, the last thing they want is to appear that they don’t have it all together. Simply asking if they need help may result in a simple, “No, we’re good.” Please don’t take that answer. Look for ways to jump in. Take the kids for an afternoon playdate. Bring a surprise coffee or flowers. One of my friends dropped by several times just to give me a hug! Offer to help with housework, bring a meal, or help with a project. If they don’t mention a need, look for one. </span></p><h1 dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 6pt; margin-top: 20pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 20pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 400; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Don’t Forget the Caregiver</span></h1><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Finally, please don’t forget the caregiver. While the person in crisis has tremendous needs, the caregiver is often overlooked. We carry much of the burden while our loved one is in crisis -- taking over extra responsibility, sacrificing sleep, and carrying our own burden of concern. Many caregivers may reach a point of caregiver burnout or even their own secondary trauma as a result of their loved one’s crisis. Ask them how they are holding up, and be willing to listen. Offer extra hugs and allow space for their emotions. In my case, my husband had always been my emotional sounding board, but in his struggle, he wasn’t able to be there for me. My friend opened her ears and her heart to mine and gave me a safe place to land when my husband couldn’t provide that. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Consider whether the caregiver may need a break. When my husband was most unstable (for about four weeks), I was with him 24/7. I couldn’t leave him alone. I couldn’t leave him with our kids. He couldn’t even drive himself to appointments. I am so grateful for one of my husband’s friends who came over to hang out with him and my sons so I could get a cup of coffee a couple of times. Those small bits of reprieve gave me what I needed to refresh and be ready to give to my husband again.</span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">We were blessed beyond measure to be surrounded by our Church community during my husband’s crisis. In listening, encouraging your friends to seek help, offering practical assistance and caring for the caregiver, you too can be the arms of Jesus to your friends in need. </span></p><br /><br /><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> </span></p><div><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 14pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></div></span><script src="http://assets.pinterest.com/js/pinit.js" type="text/javascript"></script>Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-25337863227884672972020-05-16T06:44:00.000-04:002020-05-16T06:44:09.614-04:00Why a Return to Normal (or Even a New Normal) Can Never Fix My Problem<span id="docs-internal-guid-f6fa51f7-7fff-8c0f-5bb3-45ba0451192f"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“I just wish things would get back to normal!” I hear the statement echo in my mind. The thought rises when I’m frustrated with the challenges of decontaminating our groceries or having to wear face masks or even not being able to give my friend a hug</span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">. If things just weren’t so difficult . . . If I could go to the store without fear of exposure . . . If I my kids could play sports like they planned . . . If we had more options on rainy days to get our energy out . . . If I had access to resources like our library . . . If we could get back to concerts, sports games, and amusement parks . . . If we could meet with our Church family . .</span><span style="font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> . On and on it goes. If we could just get back to normal, I would feel better. I would be okay. Life would be so much easier.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">The nagging voices of failure scratch at my sense of identity:</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You’re not enough!</span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> Your boys are bored. They are fighting again. You’ve not provided enough of an outlet. </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You’re not enough!</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You’re too much! </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You’re too emotional. Your fear, your sadness, your depression, it doesn’t have a place. Your husband can’t handle it. </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You’re too much!</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You’re not safe! </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Just look at all the people getting Covid-19. It’s awful. You’ll probably get it too. No one is defending you. It’s all on your shoulders. </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You’re not safe!</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You are alone! </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You haven’t been able to hang out with your friends for nine weeks now. Don’t you see how this is going? It’s not going to change. You won’t have any help when you need it. You won’t be surrounded next time you face a crisis. </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You are alone!</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">It’s easy to forget when I’m in the middle of the crisis that I’ve heard these voices before. Not too long ago, it looked like</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You’re not enough! </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You don’t have what it takes to care for your husband and your kids! You don’t have the energy and endurance to finish the move, the sale of the house, the routine transitions. </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You’re not enough!</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You’re too much! </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">There’s no place for your heart or your needs when your husband is in crisis. His needs rank higher. You’re too needy! </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You’re too much!</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You’re not safe! </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Your husband can no longer defend you. He may be at risk himself. You can’t rely on anyone but yourself. </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You are not safe!</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You are alone! </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Your man is emotionally withdrawn. You don’t have access to community. You have neighbors that don’t even know what’s going on. No one is there for you. </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You are alone!</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And before that, it was </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You’re not (mom) enough! You’re too much (of a failure)! You’re not safe (to be authentic)! You are alone (in your struggle)!</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;">
<span style="font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">You see, these statements existed long before my “normal” was taken away. And long before that, they were answers to questions I had been asking for years.</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;">
<span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">Am I enough?</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;">
<span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">Am I too much?</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;">
<span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">Am I safe?</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;">
<span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">Am I alone?</span></span></div>
<h2 style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: x-large;"> "These statements existed long
before my “normal” was taken away.
And long before that, they were
answers to questions I had been
asking for years."</span></span></h2>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;">
<span style="font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">I have to consider: If I’ve been answering these questions for years, if I have taken on certain identity statements, what makes me think that resuming normal life will magically make them disappear? Suddenly, I become a new me? My most ideal, best-est self with no more struggles when our country opens back up and the threat seems diminished? Or, will these statements, these answers to my questions simply take on a new form?</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;">
<span style="font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">A return to “Normal” will not fix my problem. Only a return to Jesus can!</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;">
<span style="font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">This fall, when my husband was in the middle of his PTSD crisis, I began to recognize this truth. My world was turned upside down. I faced challenges I had never experienced before. I was emotionally run through the wringer and physically spent beyond my ability. I longed for normal life to return, but my hopes for that were unsteady. The future was uncertain and so very unclear!</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;">
<span style="font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">I wasn’t doubting the truth of what I believed. I had a firm foundation in the facts of the goodness of God, that He was trustworthy, that He was sovereign, and that He was a God of love. But I had never taken the time to allow the personal truth that God loved me to take root deep in my heart.</span></span></div>
<h2 style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: x-large;"><span style="font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><i>"A return to “Normal” will
</i></span><i style="white-space: pre-wrap;">not fix my problem.
</i><i style="white-space: pre-wrap;">Only a return to Jesus can!"</i></span></h2>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;">
<span style="font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">So, I ran to Jesus. I knelt in his presence. I poured out these fears to Him!</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;">
<span style="font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">And just like the still small voice that spoke to Elijah, I heard the Spirit whisper.</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You are not alone! </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">For I will never leave you nor forsake you!</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You are always safe! </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">For I numbered your days before the dawn of time. You are sheltered under my wings of refuge.</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You are never too much, and My strength in you is enough!</span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> For I made you! You are beautiful! You are mine!</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;">
<span style="font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">And you know what happened? As I spent more time listening to the truth of how Christ saw me, as I heard His whisper over my identity, something started to shift.</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;">
<span style="font-size: large; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I continued to face new and different challenges in our journey and as we began to weather this current health crisis, I found myself recognizing the old answers to my questions much more quickly. I could name them for what they were – lies!</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">When the old voices started to surface recently again, I was able to refute them with the truths that I had learned.</span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I am not alone! I am always safe! He made me! I am beautiful! I am His!</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;">
<span style="font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">Is the struggle gone? No. I still face battles every day. But I no longer live in the illusion of “Normal” being the solution.</span></span></div>
<h2 style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: x-large; font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="text-align: start;"><i>"I no longer live in the illusion
</i></span></span><span style="font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="text-align: start;"><i>of “Normal” being the solution."</i></span></span></span></h2>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-top: 12pt;">
<span style="font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">Normal never fixed my problem! But a return to Jesus did!</span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></div>
</span>Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-73280008342190598702020-04-18T09:17:00.000-04:002020-04-18T09:17:21.631-04:00Communicating in Quarantine: The False Fuel of Assumption<div class="MsoNormal">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSUbTxTTW06APIqUt7vdujltQUzNiRjutedT9uCvOGvqvV_IyXA585CIuVAY9zCgqTdtk29ZeAhEz2-TwVQej6ly6K5O0ErzN0CRl_vcokF_5Ok3frSy14CzzNBOv4aSo0-gnZsS0ntiaW/s1600/heartsickness-428103_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1060" data-original-width="1600" height="422" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSUbTxTTW06APIqUt7vdujltQUzNiRjutedT9uCvOGvqvV_IyXA585CIuVAY9zCgqTdtk29ZeAhEz2-TwVQej6ly6K5O0ErzN0CRl_vcokF_5Ok3frSy14CzzNBOv4aSo0-gnZsS0ntiaW/s640/heartsickness-428103_1920.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Has anyone noticed that being in close quarters with another
person for long periods of time is a recipe for miscommunication? Or trying to
carry on important conversations during social distancing can cause great
misunderstanding? Relational conflict is at an all time high with these added
stressors of a global pandemic and unprecedented circumstances resulting in prolonged
periods of close contact with some people and excessive distance from others. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Easter Sunday 2020 was unlike any Easter I have ever
experienced before. I’d love to say we nailed it – that we had a beautiful day
with fantastic family memories, a delicious celebratory dinner, and a spirit of
rejoicing in our freedom through the Resurrection of our Savior. But that would
be a lie. This year, Easter was hard in more ways than one. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">The truth is our Easter looked more like my husband and I
missing each other in communication, arguing about perspective, and talking<i>
at</i> each other more than communication <i>with </i>each other – off and on
for six hours! We didn’t’ participate together in our streamed Sunday service. We
never sat down to a meal as a whole family, and we tossed some eggs in the
living room for an egg hunt at the last minute. We wound up hurt and
emotionally distant from one another.<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">The main reason for this? Assumption.<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<h2>
<b><span style="font-size: large;">Assumption Makes us look Foolish</span></b></h2>
<span style="font-size: large;">Some of you may have heard the saying, “When we assume, it makes the first
three letters out of U and ME (ASSUME)” That’s not too far from reality. I
watch my sons interact with each other. I see how quickly they can get fired
up, yelling, and getting aggressive with each other. Ironically, most of the
time, their reactions are based on an assumption that their brother intended
them harm. They feel threatened (physically or emotionally) and their fight or
flight kicks in. A rocket blasts off in their souls, and its fuel is lies. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">How could they be so foolish? And yet I find myself doing
the same thing! <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">The fuel of assumption is an artificial fuel that can only
send our rocket in one direction – destruction of relationship. We must fuel
our emotions and reactions on the truth!<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<h2>
<b><span style="font-size: large;">Assumption Signals our Fight or Flight</span></b></h2>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Have you ever felt this before? The internal burn,
increasing heart rate, and sense of a need to find protection or escape from
the situation? Our person or our identity feels threatened, and we snap back
with “Well I . . .” or offer the silent treatment and retreat. We go on the
defensive, buffering ourselves up or tearing the other person down in order to
feel better. Or we feel the need to protect ourselves from further harm, so we
go into emotional or physical hiding – sometimes both. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">More often than not, when I assume and react, my husband is
left wondering what he did wrong. His intention was not to wound, but to
communicate. Sometimes, his words come out clumsy, no doubt, but when I allow
the fuel of assumption to blast off my emotional rocket, I am submitting to
chemical processes in my brain that are not based in logic.<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">The brain always wants to protect itself and the body. If
there is a perceived threat, our sympathetic nervous system gears up for the
challenge. It shoots us into one of three responses. We fight. We flight. Or we
freeze. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<h2>
<b><span style="font-size: large;">Assumption is Framed in Past Experience</span></b></h2>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">When we make assumptions and respond out of the most base
urges of our human nature, we are allowing our previous experiences to define
our present moment. As humans, our brains remember when we’ve been hurt in the
past, and they have loaded weapons just waiting for that trigger to be pulled.
We hear a specific word or phrase, and we frame it with the memories of how we
felt when we heard that before. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">A wound from a friend when I was thirteen can come up out of
“nowhere” when my husband uses the same words that cut so deep. A look I see on
his face may resemble one my dad had when he was disappointed in me. A phrase
that hurt me years ago may be spoken in a completely different context now, yet
it creates the same reaction. The image of the past arises, and I use that same
frame to place around my husband and his intentions now. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">The reality is that my husband is not my childhood friend.
The look he gave me was one of confusion not disappointment. And the phrase is common
use language that had been spoken once in harshness and now carries that
connotation every time. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<h2>
<b><span style="font-size: large;">Assumption Creates a Win-Lose Mentality</span></b></h2>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">With these ill-fitting frames, our conversations can easily
morph from a discussion of differences to a competition of who is right and who
is wrong – or even more likely, who is better and who is worse. This adds to the
fuel of the emotional rocket as it continues a cycle of comparison, feeling
threatened and a need to defend or protect one’s self. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">When I find myself stuck in these cycles of communication,
sometimes I lose track of where we were or where we are headed. <i>What was the
intended purpose of this conversation in the first place?</i> I get the feeling
that in order to find resolution, one of us will win and the other with lose.
One will be deemed the victorious. One will be shamed. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Sure, in any relationship there is give and take, but it
should never be victor and victim! We are all humans created in the image of
God. He has called us to love Him first and foremost. Then he has called us to
love one another. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Just because my husband and I may not completely agree on
our perspective doesn’t mean that there has to be a winner and a loser. If we
are able to stop this cycle of assumption, we can more easily understand where
the other person is coming from and decide how to come to the best resolution
of our differences. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<h2>
<b><span style="font-size: large;">Stopping the Assumption Fuel</span></b></h2>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">One simple step in avoiding the relentless cycle of
assumption, is to notice. Notice when the emotions start to rise and the rocket
wants to blast off. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Stop and think about what that feels like right now. What
happens inside your chest when your spouse or close friend says that one thing?
What feelings does it evoke when you see that look? What does your heart do in
your chest? Do you feel warm or flushed? Does your breathing increase? Do you
feel muscles contract? Does your mind go blank? Do you long for escape? Do you
shut down?<br /> <br />Take a moment and put yourself there. Imagine a tough conversation.
Feel the feelings, and imagine putting a BIG RED STOP SIGN on that feeling.<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">The next time you start to feel that way, see the stop sign.
Pause. Breathe and ask yourself what it is you are feeling and thinking in that
moment. Hear the words you are telling yourself. What do you feel they are
saying to you? Take another deep breath. And then ask a clarifying question. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Here’s how it looked for us a couple weeks ago. We were
chatting when my husband said something to the effect of how he felt threatened
when I didn’t recognize something he had done. I immediately wanted to respond
in anger, “What?!? You don’t feel like I appreciate you? Well I don’t feel like
you appreciate me!”<br /><br /> But I didn’t. I stopped when I recognized the feeling, and
I asked, “Can I clarify? Are you saying that you don’t <i>ever</i> feel
appreciated by me?” I was able to determine what was fueling my emotional
reaction: the feeling of an always statement, that I never showed him
appreciation. And I asked him to clarify in a nonthreatening way. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">This gave him an opportunity to say, no, that he just meant
that one instance. Immediately, the boil in my chest subsided, and we were able
to conclude our conversation without my emotional rocket causing chaos, destruction,
and distance in our relationship.<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<h2>
<b><span style="font-size: large;">If You’re Going to Assume, Assume the Best</span></b></h2>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Assumptions are going to happen. They are going to come up
without our permission or awareness. They are going to surprise us. They are
going to throw us off kilter and begin to fuel reactions that we don’t anticipate.
We have to realize that whether we like it or not, this is the way we are
wired.<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Being in a relationship with my husband, I have to remember
that we love each other. We are committed. When we find ourselves in
communication that is leading toward assumption, I have to choose to frame his
comments in the truth. He is not intending to wound me. He loves me. He is
trying to communicate with me, and we are still growing in our ability to speak
each other’s languages. <br /> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I am in process. My husband is in process. We are continually
being formed into the image of our Creator. We are learning to communicate (and
getting much more practice due to this time of quarantine). <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Learning to notice the fuel of assumption and the initial blast
off of my emotional rocket has been so powerful in stopping what could be some
messy relational explosions. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<h2>
<b><span style="font-size: large;">Redeeming our Assumptions</span></b></h2>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Our Easter this year was hard, but it was redeemed. We salvaged
what we could as we engaged in the Sight and Sound Jesus production as a
family. We spoke truth to our boys about the freedom we have received from
Christ – the freedom from the penalty of death as well as the freedom from the
power on sin. And my husband and I made the decision to try another way. That
evening we worked through our differences, we opened our eyes to the other’s
perspective, we clarified assumptions, and we communicated our love to one
another. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<script src="https://assets.pinterest.com/js/pinit.js" type="text/javascript"></script><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">The power of the Resurrection of Jesus frees us from the
power of assumption. We don’t have to continue the cycle of chaos and destruction
in our relationships. We have His power to assume the best, to notice the
feelings, to stop and clarify. We can fuel our emotions on truth and stop the
false fuel of assumptions! We can learn a new way to communicate while in quarantine! </span><o:p></o:p></div>
Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-23881802741074159362020-03-22T14:30:00.000-04:002020-03-22T14:30:02.191-04:00"The Challenge" How to Survive this Crisis as a Whole Person<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3lIA7_-lEaaJat1X4ceHCYWBBtCs3j8IKRUU12TWvywMLFCCVbEefIhBD8GUwteCz8ZgIAGtX3cF8HirNUIJatbSPK50UeEiv8Y8owzma6X7qrif7fnLwhAuHqLWsljhyphenhyphengsLVjyfjQgbI/s1600/family-1542595_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1068" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3lIA7_-lEaaJat1X4ceHCYWBBtCs3j8IKRUU12TWvywMLFCCVbEefIhBD8GUwteCz8ZgIAGtX3cF8HirNUIJatbSPK50UeEiv8Y8owzma6X7qrif7fnLwhAuHqLWsljhyphenhyphengsLVjyfjQgbI/s640/family-1542595_1920.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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</div>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">We are in a challenging time. Most of us are stuck at home. Our kids are here. And we have nowhere to go and "nothing to do." The best way to weather a crisis is as a whole person! We cannot expect to survive this challenging time physically and hope that our mind and emotions catch up later. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">It's hard to know how to manage our time, how to invest in our families, how to make decisions when all our "normals" are gone. Our hearts feel out of place and confused. We have to create new "normals" for ourselves and our kids. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">So we've created a resource to help your kids engage in where you are with their whole person. Each day, they can chose one activity from one category (not the same category two days in a row). We have options that engage the body, the mind, the emotions, their faith, and ways that help them to think of and serve others. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Feel free to download and print whichever (or both) guides you need. Engage with us on our Facebook group "The Challenge" by Scripted Story (COVID-19 style). We would love to see how you are being fully present where you are right now. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Downloads can be accessed here: <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/515360069392177/announcements/" target="_blank">"The Challenge" Facebook Group</a> Feel free to share with friends!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">If you don't have a Facebook account and would like the printable packet emailed to you, simply email us at scriptedstoryresources@gmail.com and we will get it to you as soon as possible. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Now may the God of peace . . . . equip you with everything good that you may do his will, working in us that which is pleasing in his sight through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory forever and ever amen. Hebrews 13:20-21</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-84909321329433800322020-03-13T09:25:00.000-04:002020-03-16T06:29:32.791-04:00Loving God and Loving our Neighbor in the Midst of the COVID-19 Crisis: 7 Ways a Christian can Respond<div class="MsoNormal">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhf4hWNposmIJ35RRTVqUeESSlsUA_0Fij9lh-mP20TLUUOpxvhnBSLgrFMRH2704AYczHEO1jYhkRaKt9c4_KzGJW33JlKvGQ-RGRWp9AKrhCNIS5RYUbXRNyUztYMYeiw1yk3_Ozes67w/s1600/virus-4898571_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhf4hWNposmIJ35RRTVqUeESSlsUA_0Fij9lh-mP20TLUUOpxvhnBSLgrFMRH2704AYczHEO1jYhkRaKt9c4_KzGJW33JlKvGQ-RGRWp9AKrhCNIS5RYUbXRNyUztYMYeiw1yk3_Ozes67w/s640/virus-4898571_1920.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">I pulled into the Aldi parking lot, and I was curious that
there were so many cars. <i>It’s not the beginning of the month, it’s not even
a typical bi-weekly pay week for most people. Why are there so many people here
on a Thursday evening? <o:p></o:p></i></span><br />
<i><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">You see, Thursday evenings are my typical weekly shopping
trip while my oldest is at Karate. I had a few of my other boys with me, so we
took our time finding a parking spot and unloading. We got our cart and headed
in. I started gathering the groceries that I needed, somewhat surprised that
Aldi had not kept up on their stock this week. Bread, can goods, cereals all
picked over. People’s carts were loaded. Something was going on. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">By now, most of you might wonder how I didn’t know what the
mad rush was. <i>What, is she naive? How does she not know about the impending Armageddon?
</i>I was very well aware of growing concerns of the COVID-19 virus causing
some issues in the US. I’m a nurse. I get state issued health bulletins which
recently have encouraged good hand hygiene, staying home if you’re sick, and
limiting large gatherings. But what I couldn’t understand was the mad rush to
stock up – that is, until I was getting my milk.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I had my five-year-old reach in the refrigerator door and
pull out one gallon. That’s all we needed this week. A lady walked up behind me
and curtly stated, “You may want to get more than that. The US is going to be
put under mandatory quarantine for four weeks! They’re going to announce it
Monday! I have a good source! He’s in the military!” She continued her rant as
she moved on behind other people leaving in her wake a current of fear and
chaos. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">For a moment, my heart started beating faster. Why hadn’t I
heard this? Why hadn’t the state health bulletins told us it was coming to this?
I thought about grabbing a bunch of canned goods, boxed goods, frozen meals. I
mentally analyzed my pantry, what did I need to get us through four weeks?
Diapers? Cereal? Toilet paper? Too late on that last one as most of the toilet
paper was already gone.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I realized what I was doing – reeling in assumptive panic
based on a random woman’s comments in Aldi. I took a deep breath and calmed
myself. I thought through the logic of that actually happening and considered the
source of the information that had turned my normal shopping trip on its
emotional head. I spoke truth to myself and considered wisdom in this situation.
What was my mission as a believer in Christ living in a culture that is
panicking?<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Our country is in panic mode. Fear is reigning. People are
responding out of desperation. Ironically, similar things were seen before during
Y2K, when SARS was active, or when the H1N1 strain came to the US. As believers
in Christ, we are not supposed to respond as the culture does in these times of
crisis. What is the greatest commandment? Love the Lord your God. The second is
like it, love your neighbor as yourself. This is our mission. This is the standard
we are to hold in times of peace and times of fear.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">So, in the midst of the COVID-19 chaos, how are we supposed
to love God and love our neighbor?<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<h3>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Do Not Give Way to Fear</span></h3>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">The major pandemic right now is not this virus. It is the
fear being created and mass panic resulting in irrational behavior. As
believers in Jesus Christ, we are called to rise above fear. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">As I loaded my groceries in my trunk and the cars continued
to flood the parking lot with people literally running into the store, I heard
the birds chirping. I closed my eyes and simply listened. I remembered a conversation
Jesus had with some of his followers. Consider the birds of the air, they do
not sow or reap or store away in barns and yet your heavenly father feeds them.
Are you not more valuable than they? Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow for
tomorrow will worry about itself <a href="https://biblehub.com/esv/matthew/6.htm" target="_blank">(Matthew 6:26, 34)</a>. I breathed deep the
goodness of God, and I smiled as I passed my cart to the next panicked shopper.
<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Our God created this world out of nothing. He sustains all
things by his powerful word. He spoke a word and the blind saw, the lame leapt,
the sick were healed, and the dead were raised. He conquered death, hell, and
broke down the dividing walls of separation.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">When I live in fear, I am denying the power of God and
trying to grasp control like trying to hold sand as it slips through my
fingers. He is all powerful. How can I think that our sovereign God is not
aware of this virus and does not have the power to provide for our needs? He
knows the very hairs of my head and the number of grains of sand by the sea. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Trusting God, choosing not to fear, this is one way of loving
God in this time of uncertainty. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<h3>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Continue to Engage in Worship</span></h3>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">We’ve heard from many of our churches. Some states are limiting
large gatherings. This may affect the ways that you engage in worship time or
community. But don’t let that be an excuse for taking a break from your pursuit
of God. God is found by those who seek him. And Jesus is enthroned on the
praises of his people. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Take the extra time from cancelled events, church related or
otherwise, to get quiet before God. Tell him your concerns. He cares. Ask him
how you can meet needs around you. Praise him for his protection and his
provision. The sun rises and sets each day only by His command. Worship Him in
the splendor of His holiness. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">If your church offers streamed services, gather with a small
group of friends or simply stream them in your own home. If this isn’t an
option for you, many quality Gospel messages can be found on YouTube. Some of
my favorites are Matt Chandler, Francis Chan, and John Piper. Allow your soul
to be soaked in the truth of God’s word. It’s the one thing that can combat the
mass hysteria in our culture right now.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Let’s continue to express our love to God even when we can’t
do so corporately! <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<h3>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Know the Source of Your Information</span></h3>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">The woman that created that sense of fear in my heart was
not a quality source of information for me. More than likely, she is simply
viscerally reacting to fear inducing news stories and maybe a conversation with
a friend. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">My family has determined that it is not healthy for us
mentally or emotionally to engage in the news media. We do not watch national
or local news shows. We do not follow the news on social media. We are well
aware that the large majority of these sources blow stories out of the water
creating cultures of fear, anger, and anxiety. The media leads our culture. And
the more we engage in it, the more likely our hearts are to be led astray as
well. We also realize that we need to have some form of information when it
comes to current events. Personally, we choose to follow Christo-centric news
sources such as Family Research Counsel and the Heritage Foundation. We also
look for accurate and up to date information from original sources such as
legislation in action, CDC, and the state health bulletins. If you choose to
engage in the national or local news sources, please be aware that they
typically only share what is most exciting or scary. They thrive on inducing
fear. And their storytelling is typically embellished to make things more
interesting. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Use wisdom. Be aware of where you are getting your information.
Let’s love our neighbors by proclaiming truth and wisdom, not inciting fear and
panic from non-credible sources.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<h3>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Use Common Sense</span></h3>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Most of what is being recommended by the national health
agencies right now should be common practice anyway. Hand washing was shown to
have significant impact on decreasing the transmission of bacteria and viruses
back in the 1850s <a href="https://globalhandwashing.org/about-handwashing/history-of-handwashing/" target="_blank">(History of Handwashing</a>). For some reason, it has lost popularity.
Please wash your hands after touching high traffic surfaces – door knobs, light
switches, tables, store check out counters, and restaurant tables. By all
means, wash after using the restroom and before you eat. Common hand soap and
running water for twenty seconds is sufficient. This is not hypervigilance,
this is common sense. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Please stay home if you are feeling ill. The concern here is
possible exposure to vulnerable populations and the continuation of spread of a
virus. Elderly, and those with underlying health issues are most susceptible to
long term health issues from this virus. We can love our neighbors by not unduly
exposing them. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Please don’t overrun your hospitals for concerns over common
colds. Know the symptoms of the virus, and seek medical help only if necessary.
We need to manage our health personnel in a way that keeps them available for
those who need them most. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Please don’t go crazy buying tons of hand sanitizer, Lysol,
and medical masks. Our health industry – nurses, doctors and first responders
need access to these as they are caring for those who truly are ill. If you
wash your hands, don’t touch your face, and stay home when you’re ill, your
need of these items are not essential. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<h3>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Prepare but Don’t Panic</span></h3>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">A major issue with mass stockpiling is the issue of supply
and demand. Evidence is already speaking to this as bottles of hand sanitizer
are going for hundreds of dollars on Amazon. Shelves are empty of diapers,
toilet paper, canned goods and frozen meals. If I had jumped into the chaos
stocking hundreds of diapers and rolls of toilet paper clearing the shelves of
reserves, what would happen when the mom down to her last diaper needs one?
Some people are not in a financial situation to stockpile and have to buy
groceries and supplies as they are able. If the shelves are empty or the prices
exorbitant, they will wind up lacking their needs.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">As a Christian, I cannot simply consider my own needs, I am
told to love my neighbor as myself. And I cannot reconcile mass stockpiling
with considering the paycheck to paycheck single mom down the street. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Wisely, when it comes to being prepared, it might be prudent
to have a week or two of shelf stable items in your home in case you get ill
and need to stay away from others. This keeps you from exposing others at the
store or pharmacy. When I was at Aldi, I decided that one extra box of diapers,
a couple boxes of instant oatmeal, and some boxed mac which would give us a few
extra options if we were home bound for a few days. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<h3>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Consider Other’s Needs</span></h3>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">As you think about how this crisis, possible shutdowns, and
cancellation of events effects you, don’t forget to consider how the effect
others as well. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">What of the elderly lady who is home bound? Does she need
groceries? Someone to pick up her medications? What of the poverty level kids
who are not able to get meals at school for the next few weeks? Are their local
programs you could donate to? Could you prep some meals or drop off some lunch
items to a neighbor who may be hurting? <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">How can we be the body, the hands and feet, of Jesus in this
time of Crisis? Look for the needs around you. Ask God to show you how to love
your neighbor well. He will. Then act – out of love. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Not fear!<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<h3>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Continue to Live Your Life</span></h3>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">It’s tempting in times like this to immerse ourselves in the
current event and forget that each minute, each day, our children are growing,
our families are aging, and moments are passing. Use these times when you are
home more together to invest in each other. Play games. Ask questions. Snuggle.
Spend extra time with your spouse. Make memories. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Communicate to your kids this current crisis in terms they
can understand, but don’t create fear. Communicate truth. Love your kids by
leading them to Jesus when they are afraid. (Your children are your neighbors
too.) <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Do what you do with excellence and for the glory of God.
Even the eating, drinking, cleaning, and wiping baby bottoms are ways that we
can bring God glory if we choose to serve Him by serving those He’s blessed us
with. Love God by loving others!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<script src="https://assets.pinterest.com/js/pinit.js" type="text/javascript"></script><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Friends, God’s got this! Might it be possible to look at
this situation as more of an opportunity than a threat? How can you choose to
rise above? How can you choose to love God and love others in the midst of the
COVID-19 crisis? May we love Him and love others well! </span><o:p></o:p></div>
Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-77838660192615717222020-02-25T10:37:00.000-05:002020-02-25T14:13:02.295-05:00When Pain is Not The Problem<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcbYSUUkdu3yllilNZeoniZMpQI6l4k9DfENCAetg_rk4JgBlZR0zhSSeH1oElejc8gzGOEnN-clbXWr0Upp4pHYtStScSM0kQDjh7yoOW4TlzEeMvgBrZoRVUovFYwro2MtgGI9hatlB5/s1600/smile-191626_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcbYSUUkdu3yllilNZeoniZMpQI6l4k9DfENCAetg_rk4JgBlZR0zhSSeH1oElejc8gzGOEnN-clbXWr0Upp4pHYtStScSM0kQDjh7yoOW4TlzEeMvgBrZoRVUovFYwro2MtgGI9hatlB5/s640/smile-191626_1920.jpg" width="640"></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">One night last week just before bedtime, my ten-year-old
called me over. “Mom, I have a toothache, and my gum hurts a lot too.” <br><br><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I did what any mom would do and grabbed a flashlight. Shining
the bright LED into his mouth, I saw a red, swollen gum where he pointed to the
source of the pain. “Ouch, dude. That looks like it hurts. How long has that
been going on?” I asked. <br><br><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“Since Saturday.” He responded. <br><br><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I called my husband over, and we both made the decision that
we should probably make a trip to the dentist in the morning. It could be a cavity
or even headed toward an abscess. Anxiety rose in my heart as I thought about
how this might affect our next few days – the time involved, the cost, and
managing his pain. We gave him some ibuprofen and ushered him to bed. <br><br><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I didn’t sleep well that night, and the next morning, I felt
my nerves on edge until we called the dentist’s office and settled on a 9:00
appointment. We quickly got the kids ready and gathered the school books – can’t
let an appointment turn the school day on its head! And we headed out the door.
<br><br><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">My mind raced as I thought through all the possibilities as
the road moved under our tires. Would they do something today? Would we have to
schedule another appointment later this week or even several appointments? How
would he handle the procedure(s)? And most of all, I felt like some sort of
failure for not teaching him to brush his teeth better. Cue “bad mom syndrome.”
<br><br><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I sat in the waiting room with the younger boys while my
husband went back with the oldest. I bounced my knees with nervous energy. What
were they finding? What was taking so long? In reality, they were probably not gone
more than about twenty minutes, but it felt like an eternity.<br><br><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">When they emerged, my son made a bee-line for the video
games, and my husband walked over. He shrugged his shoulders. “Everything is
good.” He stated calmly. I’m sure my mouth dropped. “His teeth are all intact,
no decay, no infection. It’s just his adult teeth trying to push the baby
molars out. The dentist said to encourage him to wiggle them more to get the
little ones out of the way.”<br><br><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I blinked a few times as the news settled in. My son was
growing up. He was in pain because he is growing into the man God wants him to
be. Wiggle the tooth. The new one will come in. Everything is okay. The pain is
not a problem. <br><br><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">We got back in the car, and I drove in silence as I processed
this rather good news. And it revealed something to me – Pain is not always a
problem. It does not always signify a problem. Sometimes it signifies growth.
In some ways, I felt like an idiot for not thinking through that possibility in
the midst of all my worrying. But in other ways, I wonder if God allowed this
small speed bump to teach me a deeper lesson. <br><br><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">We are trained to look at pain as a problem. We are raised
with the ideas that pain is your body’s way of telling you something is wrong.
The sore throat tells you you’re sick. The headache states that you’re tired,
stressed, or in need of coffee. The burning lungs might signify asthma, and the
aching heart can whisper of loss. We pull our hands away from heat so we don’t
get burned. We add layers if we are tingly cold. We step away from
relationships that seem too hurtful.<br><br><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">On the other hand, the aching gums tell us we are growing up
and getting new teeth (yup, I know this now). The burning muscles tell us new
fibers are being added and we are getting stronger. And the rhythmic tightening
of the womb tells us we are about to birth new life. Pain doesn’t always mean
something is wrong. Sometimes, pain tells us that something is very much right!<br><br><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">The problem comes when we look at all pain from the same
angle without taking time to understand its source or its message. We feel a
sensation that sends a signal to our brain – “pain” is the message that is
communicated from that source. But the nerve impulse doesn’t differentiate between
bad pain and good pain. It’s just all sensed as “pain”. <br><br><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">The nervous system is incredible in its ability to warn us of
a problem. God created it this way, and it is very good. I’m amazed at how
quickly we will remove our finger from the poke of the needle before we even
consciously realize that we were pricked. Pain is in place to protect us from
further injury. <br><br><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">But pain is also present in growth – as in the case of my
son’s tooth. His gums were being “injured” to some degree. His nerves were
sending a message to his brain which communicated pain. The process of the baby
teeth being replaced by the adult teeth can be painful as the mouth makes room
for the larger molars. But that pain signifies growth, not a problem. So my getting worked up over a potential problem actually served to create much more stress than was ever necessary. There wasn't a problem after all!<br><br><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">What if, when we sensed pain, we took an honest look at it?
What if, rather than working ourselves into a frenzy, we slowed down and
considered all the options? What if we looked at pain as a gift rather than a
problem? What if we saw it as potential for growth rather than an inhibitor to
our lives? What if we pushed into it rather than avoiding it?<br><br><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">The adult tooth will take longer to come in if my son does nothing.
The dentist said to wiggle the baby one, to work on getting it out of the way.
If my son tries to ignore the pain and live his life, the pain will last longer.
But if he wiggles that tooth, the new one can break through and he will grow
one step closer to being a man. <br><br><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">What do you need to wiggle today rather than worrying about
or ignoring? It’s natural to want to avoid what hurts us, but what if engaging
is what it takes to see a friendship blossom? It’s easy to worry when we don’t
understand cause, but what if taking time to understand brought clarity? It’s
tempting to pretend everything is okay, but what if getting honest with ourselves is how healing comes?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br>We have a choice in how we handle our pain. We can worry about it. We can try
to avoid it. Or we can wiggle it and see what potential lies under the surface.<br><br><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<script src="https://assets.pinterest.com/js/pinit.js" type="text/javascript"></script><br>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">It might just be that a new tooth is ready to emerge! </span><o:p></o:p></div>
Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-88412179773412084242020-02-07T15:56:00.000-05:002020-02-08T15:25:14.479-05:00The Role I Never Asked For<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRv7LujbUnYrxCOySvvemRxFVYuXH7VfyKV9kCHeu0_yeoRx1OUA8rhrGtP9A6szD10F6BG9wJohr8g9DWEoQ_pkdfIkYsW8ekCHb9UldS1pEriBN-QjDenAsNOrLLTfa7YD7eTWdC7qtl/s1600/couple-2585743_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRv7LujbUnYrxCOySvvemRxFVYuXH7VfyKV9kCHeu0_yeoRx1OUA8rhrGtP9A6szD10F6BG9wJohr8g9DWEoQ_pkdfIkYsW8ekCHb9UldS1pEriBN-QjDenAsNOrLLTfa7YD7eTWdC7qtl/s640/couple-2585743_1920.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“Be here now” is a phrase that hangs on my living room wall.
It’s also a common phrase to hear tossed around my home as well as that of my
extended family. The concept is simple. The practice, not so much. Behind this
phrase lies the idea of learning to be present, to be engaged, to not be
worried and concerned about many things. Yes, I tend to have a Martha heart, so
the goal of being present is one I constantly strive toward. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Each year, I prayerfully choose a word to make my aim for
that year. 2020’s word happens to be “Present.” I anticipated simplifying,
letting some things go, and taking on less responsibility. What I didn’t expect
was the precursor battle over <i>where</i> I would need to be present. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Leading up to the shift in decades, I thought I knew where I
would be when the twenty-teens turned the corner. I would be in a smaller house
with less commitments, I would be homeschooling my boys, working part-time, and
basically choosing where to invest my extra time. But my journey took an
unexpected turn when in early November, my husband experienced a crisis of
anxiety, panic, and insomnia that we later learned was connected to complex
PTSD. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">My semi-predictable world was turned upside down. Our home was
under contract to be sold and we were negotiating projects to be completed
before closing. I was managing guests and maintenance at our AirBnB property a
town away. I was homeschooling our sons. And now, in the midst of my husbands
near daily struggle, I found myself alone in managing much of life and thrust
into a new role that I never asked for. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Mental illness is something that happened to other people,
not us! Really, if anyone lost it, it should have been me. My husband was a
rock! Now, I couldn’t be strong enough to make him feel safe. I found myself
having to learn to listen to deep, dark struggles and scary thoughts – honestly,
they scared me too, but he needed me to be his safe place. I couldn’t allow
myself to struggle. My routine driven nature that thrived on set expectations
was stretched in extreme flexibility as I ebbed and flowed with my husband’s
needs. The questions were endless. And I felt alone, so alone.<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Recently, I was challenged to take an honest look at where I
am in life right now – to answer questions objectively, to accept with grace
the place God has allowed (and privileged) me to be in, then to fully immerse
myself fully present in the <i>where</i> that I happen to be. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I was posed with questions to ponder. Question like: Has
something recently changed in your life? Does a member of your family require more
from you in this season? Is a loved one struggling with anxiety, panic, or a
sickness? I felt like this woman had a secret portal in looking at my past few
months. I felt struck by the questions, and as I considered the answers, I saw
how I had been denying reality all along. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Each time the thought of my husband struggling with a mental
illness would arise, I would quickly push it to the side. Anytime I was
overwhelmed by my new-found responsibilities, I would look to the future
convincing myself it would not always be this way. I found ways to escape my
present reality by keeping myself busy, by investing in my sons, by eating ice cream.
I wasn’t present. I was fighting the role I had been given with everything I
was. I didn’t want to be where I was. I wanted things to go back to normal.<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Care-giving is excruciating when you expect to be the one
cared for. I found myself here as my husband's and my roles shifted for a season.
I had to be strong because he was weak. I had to face my deepest fears head on:
being alone and not feeling protected. I felt responsible for so much from the
sale of our home and our upcoming move, to the stability of our sons, and the
health of my husband. I didn’t like it one bit. I despised where I was. I hurt
so much. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">It’s 2020 now, and I long to be present. But I realize that
in order to be here now. I need to understand where I am. And in order to
understand where I am, I must admit and accept where I have been. As I look
back over the past several months, I see that I was given a critical role at a critical
time. It was a role that only I could fill. I didn’t ask for it. I didn’t like
it. But the reality is that God allowed it. Not only did he allow me to walk
this path, but he equipped me with <a href="https://biblehub.com/2_peter/1-3.htm" target="_blank">everything I needed </a>for each
step of the journey. His <a href="https://biblehub.com/2_corinthians/12-9.htm" target="_blank">grace</a> and his <a href="https://biblehub.com/isaiah/41-10.htm" target="_blank">power</a> was more than sufficient. And He was <a href="https://biblehub.com/joshua/1-9.htm" target="_blank">with me</a> each step of the way.<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">My change in roles was a challenge I never expected. It
caught me off guard. I felt displaced and wounded. And as I’ve realized that it
is okay to admit that, I’ve started to open my heart and my hands. I’m learning
to hold my emotions gently, to be honest with myself and God about what was
hard and why and allow him to bring healing and hope there. Admitting where I
was and accepting that role, I’m opening myself to be <i>where </i>I am now. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">The present phase of our journey is not as intense as it
was. In many ways, we’ve found healing and we are moving toward healthy balance
in our roles once again. Where I am right now is in a season of transition, and
I must be willing to accept my where now in order to fully engage in the
present. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Your role may not be like mine. Maybe singleness is the role
you never asked for – barrenness, being widowed or divorced. Maybe it’s a
diagnosis that started the role of a patient. Maybe your role is caregiver for a
parent, a spouse, a child, or even a grandchild. Maybe it’s a financial season of hardship, the
necessity of an extra job to provide or cutting corners of your budget. Maybe you are enduring a strained relationship and your role is to be the one to reconcile. Or maybe your loved one has deployed and your are left to manage the home front and feel so alone.<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">A change in roles can be excruciating, challenging, disheartening,
discouraging. And that’s okay to admit. Hold your emotions gently. Honor the way the role is making you feel and know that
you can pour out your heart to Jesus when your role seems too much to bear. Then be there. Be all there. Be brave, my friend, the Lord your God is with you wherever you go!</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">"Now may the God of peace, who through the blood of the eternal covenant brought back from the dead our Lord Jesus, that great Shepherd of the sheep, equip you with every good thing to do His will. And may He accomplish in us what is pleasing in His sight through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen" (Hebrews 13:20-21).</span></div>
<script src="https://assets.pinterest.com/js/pinit.js" type="text/javascript"></script>Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-51413703526258672762019-08-29T12:03:00.000-04:002019-08-29T12:03:33.512-04:00"What Are You Thinking?" When the Foolishness of God is Wiser - Making Hard Decisions That Go Against the Flow<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“What are you thinking?”<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"> “Are you serious?” <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“Are you sure that’s the right decision?”<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“What about your kids?” (or your space, your stuff, your
place, your time, your . . .)<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuUCJsHSI9fUDtiFXl5hKRvgqMJ8lhlZFYsN16k__pc5swYk3FKhZHyc-m206ag1toknrH03rX3Wd5tUGygITNgf6V51wsOV2WT0u6VqWsZBquxRbed9M10yXfJRFWOq0TvRB9sHJ_Rehl/s1600/shutters-669296_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1051" data-original-width="1600" height="420" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuUCJsHSI9fUDtiFXl5hKRvgqMJ8lhlZFYsN16k__pc5swYk3FKhZHyc-m206ag1toknrH03rX3Wd5tUGygITNgf6V51wsOV2WT0u6VqWsZBquxRbed9M10yXfJRFWOq0TvRB9sHJ_Rehl/s640/shutters-669296_1920.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br />They get that confused look on their face as we share our
news. “Foolishness,” they might think. “Crazy!” “I could never do that!”<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">You’d think we were announcing something radical like
shaving our heads and joining a nudist colony or something. But nope, that’s definitely
NOT our news!<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">We’re moving. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">It’s that simple. We are selling our 2600 square foot house
in a nice neighborhood to move back into our 1300 square foot older home across
the state line. We will go from four
bedrooms to three, from three bathrooms to two, from a quarter acre to about a tenth
of an acre, from a finished basement to a “Michigan basement.” We will go from
bigger to smaller. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">This is not the norm. This is not the expected, and
therefore not the accepted. In America, we have the American Dream. We are
always looking out for me first. We are constantly thinking about how to get
ahead, how to have our cake and eat it too. Bigger. Better. Faster. Flirtier.
More expensive. More extravagant!<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">We see the raised eyebrows, hear the whispers, feel the
pity. <i>Did something happen? Are they okay? Can they not afford it anymore?<o:p></o:p></i></span><br />
<i><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">It’s foolishness. Simply the foolishness of God. <a href="https://biblehub.com/1_corinthians/1-25.htm" target="_blank">1Corinthians 1:25</a> states that the foolishness of God is wiser than man’s wisdom.
<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Man’s wisdom says bigger. God’s foolishness says <a href="https://biblehub.com/mark/9-35.htm" target="_blank">smaller</a>.
Man’s wisdom says me first. God’s foolishness says <a href="https://biblehub.com/philippians/2-3.htm" target="_blank">others first</a>. Man’s wisdom
says get ahead. God’s foolishness says to <a href="https://biblehub.com/niv/1_timothy/6.htm" target="_blank">steward well what you have and look toward the future reward</a>. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">To be honest, in my own humanness, this is not a decision I
would make. But when I look through the glasses of the foolishness of God, I
can see clearly the eternal wisdom of this choice. Selling now, will give us
the opportunity to be debt free and the freedom to save, serve, and spend the
resources we’ve been entrusted with in the ways God calls us to.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Will it be hard? Yes. But friends, I’ve learned that I can
do the hard things if I know it makes God smile. Will it be challenging? Yes.
But He gives more grace! Will it be emotional? Absolutely! Who wants to leave
their place of comfort and memories?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I’ve struggled with this decision. I’ve cried. I’ve started
a grieving process that will take me a while. But I’ve also found peace – a peace
that surpasses even my understanding.<br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">As humans, throughout our lives, we make decisions. Some
easy. Some hard. Some make sense, and others don’t. My friends, whatever
decision you’re facing, I pray you will seek and find the heart of God. Whether
your choice does or doesn’t make sense in the wisdom of this world, I pray you
will stand with resolve in the hard thing. Our choices may confuse our friends
and even our family. But if we are walking in step with the Holy Spirit, we can
rest assured that the foolishness of God is wiser! </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-58533735742946512492019-07-07T07:12:00.000-04:002019-07-07T07:12:01.471-04:00What Did I Do to Deserve . . . ?<div class="MsoNormal">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgATAilZy6u3v1ARVVJUHWTJJNfQMomeeyUv1PqR4HfSvpLjXyOy_JwUNSoffdSzPJdPVsA2b6y7NfiCUhc2_kofrQq1azETxprSu-pvmFz_icSsPN1hF1J7O7ykhRBkjcPXphGFhuhgsNR/s1600/woman-1245788_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1063" data-original-width="1600" height="424" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgATAilZy6u3v1ARVVJUHWTJJNfQMomeeyUv1PqR4HfSvpLjXyOy_JwUNSoffdSzPJdPVsA2b6y7NfiCUhc2_kofrQq1azETxprSu-pvmFz_icSsPN1hF1J7O7ykhRBkjcPXphGFhuhgsNR/s640/woman-1245788_1920.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">I headed out on a walk/run this morning for the first time since
I delivered our son. The sun had not yet risen. I turned on my playlist – the same
one that played as I pushed through the fear and the pain to protect my baby
and bring life into the world. A rush of emotions flooded back as I thought
back to that day, and as I pushed my body, as my feet pounded the pavement, I
remembered pushing, pushing pushing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I thought about my little boy – in the months leading up to
the day of his birth, he grew in my womb. He developed just as God designed; he
rolled and tumbled and kicked me from the inside. Before I even met him, I was
in love. And as of yet, he had done absolutely nothing to deserve that love. He
hadn’t flashed me a gummy smile. He hadn’t gazed deep into my eyes. He hadn’t
babbled or uttered the first “I wuv you.” But as I realized his life was in
danger, I was willing to do anything. Anything! I loved my son already because
of who he was – my son! And I wanted life for him.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">As I continued my route this morning, my music began to
serenade me the lyrics of “<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ru61L5l5GMQ" target="_blank">One Thing Remains/How He Loves</a>.” And I began to
ponder the cross – the cross that Christ pushed through. The pain. The agony.
He pushed, pushed, pushed. And as of yet, we had done nothing to deserve that
kind of love. We had not sung his praise. We had not lifted our hands to
heaven. We had not told our neighbors of his greatness. He realized our lives were in danger, and Jesus was willing to do anything. Anything! He loved us already! While we
were still sinners Christ died for us (<a href="https://www.blogger.com/I%20headed%20out%20on%20a%20walk/run%20this%20morning%20for%20the%20first%20time%20since%20I%20delivered%20our%20son.%20The%20sun%20had%20not%20yet%20risen.%20I%20turned%20on%20my%20playlist%20%E2%80%93%20the%20same%20one%20that%20played%20as%20I%20pushed%20through%20the%20fear%20and%20the%20pain%20to%20protect%20my%20baby%20and%20bring%20life%20into%20the%20world.%20A%20rush%20of%20emotions%20flooded%20back%20as%20I%20thought%20back%20to%20that%20day,%20and%20as%20I%20pushed%20my%20body%20as%20my%20feet%20pounded%20the%20pavement,%20I%20remembered%20pushing,%20pushing%20pushing.%20I%20thought%20about%20my%20little%20boy%20%E2%80%93%20in%20the%20months%20leading%20up%20to%20the%20day%20of%20his%20birth,%20he%20grew%20in%20my%20womb.%20He%20developed%20just%20as%20God%20designed;%20he%20rolled%20and%20tumbled%20and%20kicked%20me%20from%20the%20inside.%20Before%20I%20even%20met%20him,%20I%20was%20in%20love.%20And%20as%20of%20yet,%20he%20had%20done%20absolutely%20nothing%20to%20deserve%20that%20love.%20He%20hadn%E2%80%99t%20flashed%20me%20a%20gummy%20smile.%20He%20hadn%E2%80%99t%20gazed%20deep%20into%20my%20eyes.%20He%20hadn%E2%80%99t%20babbled%20or%20uttered%20the%20first%20%E2%80%9CI%20wuv%20you.%E2%80%9D%20But%20as%20I%20realized%20his%20life%20was%20in%20danger,%20I%20was%20willing%20to%20do%20anything.%20Anything!%20I%20loved%20my%20son%20already%20because%20of%20who%20he%20was%20%E2%80%93%20my%20son!%20And%20I%20wanted%20life%20for%20him.%20As%20I%20continued%20my%20route%20this%20morning,%20my%20music%20began%20to%20serenade%20me%20the%20lyrics%20of%20%E2%80%9COne%20Thing%20Remains/How%20He%20Loves.%E2%80%9D%20And%20I%20began%20to%20ponder%20the%20cross%20%E2%80%93%20the%20cross%20that%20Christ%20pushed%20through.%20The%20pain.%20The%20agony.%20He%20pushed,%20pushed,%20pushed.%20And%20as%20of%20yet,%20we%20had%20done%20nothing%20to%20deserve%20that%20kind%20of%20love.%20We%20had%20not%20sung%20his%20praise.%20We%20had%20not%20lifted%20our%20hands%20to%20heaven.%20We%20had%20not%20told%20our%20neighbors%20of%20his%20greatness.%20And%20yet,%20yet%20while%20we%20were%20still%20sinners%20Christ%20died%20for%20us%20(Romans%205:8).%20And%20because%20of%20his%20great%20love%20for%20us,%20God%20who%20is%20rich%20in%20mercy%20made%20us%20Alive%20with%20Christ%20while%20we%20were%20yet%20dead%20in%20our%20sins%20(Eph.%202:4).%20He%20love%20us%20not%20because%20of%20what%20we%E2%80%99ve%20done,%20but%20because%20of%20who%20we%20are%20%E2%80%93%20His%20creation,%20his%20children%20%E2%80%93%20and%20he%20wanted%20(and%20wants)%20life%20for%20us.%20Life,%20not%20death!%20He%20pushed%20through.%20Christ%20brought%20us%20life%20where%20we%20would%20have%20faced%20death%20and%20separation%20from%20him.%20He%20loves%20us,%20oh,%20how%20he%20loves%20us!" target="_blank">Romans 5:8</a>). And because of his great
love for us, God who is rich in mercy made us <b>alive</b> with Christ while we were
yet dead in our sins (<a href="https://biblehub.com/ephesians/2-4.htm" target="_blank">Eph. 2:4</a>). He love us not because of what we’ve done, but
because of who we are – His creation, his children – and he wanted (and wants)
life for us. Life, not death!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<script src="https://assets.pinterest.com/js/pinit.js" type="text/javascript"></script><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I pushed through the pain to bring my son life. And Christ pushed through the pain to bring us life. Me. You. Us. We are loved, friends. So greatly Loved!</span></div>
Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-26881925749198143742019-06-02T11:57:00.000-04:002019-06-06T12:55:00.959-04:00"But it Hurts So Bad!" The Crucial Choice to Courageously Push Into the Pain or Hold Back in Fear<span style="font-size: large;">Thirteen hours! It has been thirteen hours of irregular
contractions that had gotten stronger and led us to this point. This is not
what I expected for the birth of our sixth son. None of my other labors had
lasted this long, but it was finally time – finally time to push my little man
into this world.</span><br>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span>
<h3>
<span style="font-size: large;">Finally, Time to Push</span></h3>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I assumed a comfortable (that term is relative) position in
the birthing tub and waited for the next contraction. As it washed over me, I
bore down into it just to the point of comfort. That’s what we had been taught
in Bradley Classes and had worked before in our other births. I felt pressure
and knew that was a good thing. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">That contraction passed, and our midwife decided to get
heart tones again. As she placed the probe on my belly, I breathed deep
preparing myself for the next contraction. <i>Lub
dub, lub dub.</i> My ears couldn’t escape the incredibly slow rate of the
heartbeat of our little boy. I took a deep breath willing that the rate
increase. It didn’t. My midwife assured me that it was just his descent through
my pelvis and didn’t seem too worried.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">The next contraction started to build, and I inhaled before
bearing down again. I felt the familiar burn as his head came lower. I opened
my eyes and caught my breath about to push again, when I noticed a bright red
gush of blood. (Being a nurse, my brain immediately went into diagnosis mode.)
I knew I hadn’t torn since he was not yet crowning. The only other probability
of that kind of bleeding was that his placenta had detached as I was pushing. Suddenly,
I realized that our little boy still inside me was no longer receiving oxygen
from my body. The only way to help him at this point was to get him out and get
him out fast!</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<h3>
<span style="font-size: large;">Pushing Through</span></h3>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I didn’t even wait for the next contraction before starting
to push again. His head descended and began to crown. The pressure, the
burning! Guttural instinct made me want to wince and hold back. It hurt so bad!
But I knew in this moment, the best way to protect my child was to push into
that pain, no matter the cost to myself. I took another breath and began to
roar like a mamma grizzly as I pushed into all of that pressure. My body
stretching, burning, aching. I was scared, but I knew that in this moment,
courage must overcome that fear. Bravery must prevail. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbEoiTaHJWUULU8UNuXhIUB_4qPqIrdNwE35MyHIUWj6Qc9-z4i0mOlbDjL8OPpv1CgrqL8ZYhHq1YKyzTyLeBP7qlF4NuAIHXLU6RuLQNdsjJi16esgp3yb9rYW8Er0hyphenhyphennIpvMDxkmA6i/s1600/Blog+edit+2.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1072" data-original-width="1600" height="428" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbEoiTaHJWUULU8UNuXhIUB_4qPqIrdNwE35MyHIUWj6Qc9-z4i0mOlbDjL8OPpv1CgrqL8ZYhHq1YKyzTyLeBP7qlF4NuAIHXLU6RuLQNdsjJi16esgp3yb9rYW8Er0hyphenhyphennIpvMDxkmA6i/s640/Blog+edit+2.JPG" width="640"></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">The worship music that I had playing provided encouragement for
me to grasp as I let out a gasp and pushed again. Finally, his head emerged.
The midwife was now instructing me to continue pushing to release his shoulders
and abdomen. I heard the intensity in her tone and knew I could not rest just
yet. Another breath, and this push took everything I had. His shoulders corkscrewed
and released, and he slipped into my husbands waiting hands. The midwife helped
to untangle a tight cord around his neck before I was able to lift him out of
the water and bring him close. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<h3>
<span style="font-size: large;">Is He Okay?</span></h3>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">When he emerged, he did not gasp, he did not grunt. He was
blue, flaccid, and floppy. We immediately started rubbing his back, stimulating
his little body for some sort of response. The midwife felt his cord, and his
heart rate was present, but low. Panic rose in my chest. Had I done enough? Was
he going to be okay? I wanted to cry, but the time was not right. We needed to get
him breathing. The midwife started to pull out her resuscitation equipment. Another
few seconds passed and then a mew, a grunt, a grimace. We were getting a
response. That first cry allowed me to breathe a sigh of relief. His tone and
his color were improving. He was going to be okay!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKxYVQ48POnyd1tUD4ijqVogsl-fG9Cbjo1z9EaTITAr9gKchq5TOjpnQZYJnWBM2pdp1EB_YnCMUeFn-sPSPCpKvKINpqLUUATaxn2iqdVyQ-YAhc02UVNjHra4zd-blYqjAWmvuiUNB6/s1600/Blog+edit+3.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1143" data-original-width="1600" height="456" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKxYVQ48POnyd1tUD4ijqVogsl-fG9Cbjo1z9EaTITAr9gKchq5TOjpnQZYJnWBM2pdp1EB_YnCMUeFn-sPSPCpKvKINpqLUUATaxn2iqdVyQ-YAhc02UVNjHra4zd-blYqjAWmvuiUNB6/s640/Blog+edit+3.JPG" width="640"></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">My son is now five-days-old and is doing well. It has taken
me a while to process through this birth experience – so different from all of
my others, and not exactly what I expected or dreamed for our last birth, but as I’ve prayed and thought through
the painful and fearful aspects of this birth, I’ve come to realize that the
decision I was faced with that day is a decision that I’m faced with many days
of my life. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">When something hurts me, I have a choice to push into that
pain in strength and courage or retreat in fear and self-preservation. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<h3>
<span style="font-size: large;">The Choices We Face</span></h3>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">We all face these choices. The pain we encounter isn’t
always physical like the pain of childbirth. Sometimes it’s the wounds from
words or actions of a spouse, a parent, a close friend. It might be a disappointment
of a dream unfulfilled – an engagement or marriage that falls through, the
dream house that couldn’t be financed, the job that you were let go from, the
empty arms when you long for a child. Maybe it's the pregnancy that was not in your plans or you're facing a chronic disease that
does cause physical pain, fears, and so many unknowns. It could be you've lost a loved one, and the thought of continuing alone is terrifying. Or maybe it's an upcoming
opportunity that is causing nervous fear that you might fail – a talent show, a
job interview, a promotional venture, or a big move. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">In each place that we are confronted with pain and fear, we
are also met with a choice: to push into or run away from. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I don’t like to presume the worst, but in the case of the
birth of our son, had I not risen to that challenge and pushed through the
pain, he very well could have wound up brain injured due to lack of oxygenation.
Or worse, it may have resulted in his death. And my lack of pushing through
that pain in the moment would have caused tremendously more pain in the long
run. My holding back would have been more comfortable for me in the moment, but
it could have caused permanent pain on behalf of my son – or in my own heart had
I lost him. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">So what do I do when we face these fearful and painful
circumstance and it’s easier to want to run?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<h3>
<span style="font-size: large;">Courage over Fear:</span></h3>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<h4>
<span style="font-size: large;">Realize Fear is About Me, Not Others</span></h4>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">My desires to hold back my efforts in pushing were to facilitate
my own comfort. Had I given into fear, it would have been all about me. I loved
my son. I wanted what’s best for him. In order to push past the fear, I had to
get my eyes off myself and consider my son as more important that me <a href="https://biblehub.com/philippians/2-3.htm" target="_blank">(Phil.2:3-4)</a>. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<h4>
<span style="font-size: large;">Realize I’m Not Alone</span></h4>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">One of the verses that continued to come up during my labor
and birth was Isaiah 41:10. “Do not fear for I am with you. Do not be afraid
for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you by my
righteous right hand.” It’s easy to give into fear when I think I’m all alone.
In those moments of pain, I had to grasp onto the faith that God promised he
would never leave me nor forsake me <a href="https://biblehub.com/deuteronomy/31-6.htm" target="_blank">(Deut. 31:6)</a>. I could lean hard into him
when I was afraid knowing that I was not on my own. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<h4>
<span style="font-size: large;">Realize That the Outcome Does Not Stop at Me</span></h4>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">When our son finally emerged from the water and into my
arms, I immediately faced fear again of whether I had done enough. I remember
as a teen and young adult, my dad would encourage me to work like it all
depended on me, but to trust like it all depended on God. Or my pastor would
state that God’s sovereignty does not undermine man’s responsibility. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">As I’ve grown in my understanding of these exhortations, I’ve
realized that the truth of what they were saying was more balanced than I
initially understood. My trust in God doesn’t give me a right to be passive and
simply wait for him to move, and sometimes that’s the temptation. <i>Okay, You’re God. If you’re in control, what
are you going to do to get me out of this? </i>But had I taken that approach in
the birth of my son, he would have been oxygen starved much longer than he was.
I had to work. I had to put in effort even though it hurt. Then, I had to trust
God with the results. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">When I work hard, and push into the pain in strength and
courage rather than running away in fear, the results may not always turn out
perfectly. Sometimes, I may walk away feeling like a failure. Many times, I may
have more questions than answers. The friendship may never blossom again. The
disease may take over and take my independence away and suck the life out of
me. The job may fall through. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">But if I don’t try, if I don’t take a stand in courage, if I’m
unwilling to push through the pain, I may never know the joy of the new life it
might bring about on the other side. Courage over fear, my friends. Courage
over fear! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“Have I not commanded you to be strong and courageous? Do
not be afraid or discouraged, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you
go.” Joshua 1:9<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<br>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X90XBZSSX2I" target="_blank">(The song that’s playing in my head and heart!)</a></span><o:p></o:p></div>
<script src="https://assets.pinterest.com/js/pinit.js" type="text/javascript"></script>Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-24543123673646291902019-05-26T15:18:00.000-04:002019-06-06T13:10:58.495-04:00When my "Maybe Someday" Doesn't Happen and I'm Left Longing<div class="MsoNormal">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWdJqCqdrUTMW-yYHbZSwsDV5ikDOF46_QBmrXWk81vlz7cm1t6PGpKfOojw4bdtSYM1QLJdOyESohG6lefdZ4ree36x17WDDja-UYzBwPHIWAAvmNzYCTV8mD4TZrsJb_BSN2mdCuAv4d/s1600/woman-491623_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1066" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWdJqCqdrUTMW-yYHbZSwsDV5ikDOF46_QBmrXWk81vlz7cm1t6PGpKfOojw4bdtSYM1QLJdOyESohG6lefdZ4ree36x17WDDja-UYzBwPHIWAAvmNzYCTV8mD4TZrsJb_BSN2mdCuAv4d/s640/woman-491623_1920.jpg" width="640"></a></div>
<br>
<span style="font-size: large;">When my first son was born, I was so ecstatic that it was a
boy. My husband had his first-born-son, and with that desire of his fulfilled, I
felt I could give in fully to my own desires for a girl. Each pregnancy as we
would have our ultrasound and hear “It’s a boy!” that hope would dwindle just a
little, but the hope was still there, nonetheless. <o:p></o:p></span><br>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Through the past ten years of having only boys, I would come
across pictures of little girls or moms with their daughters, and my own
longings would rise of desiring to share in that kind of legacy myself. Most
times, I would sigh and console myself with the thoughts of “<i>Maybe Someday!”</i> <o:p></o:p></span><br>
<i><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Several weeks ago, I was scrolling through my Pinterest feed
when I came across a little girl dressed in a sparkly blue princess dress who
was just about to curtsy. That familiar ache rose into my chest, I immediately
thought “<i>Maybe Someday”</i> and continued
to scroll. Then I realized what I had just done, and my heart dropped as I
reminded myself that it won’t be that "<i>Maybe Someday"</i>
anymore. That season is over. We have six sons. This is God’s best for us, and
there’s no more looking to the future of “someday” that my heart’s desire will
be fulfilled. <o:p></o:p></span><br>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I paused and pondered the ways I had consoled myself each
time those longings surfaced. And I realized that my “<i>Maybe Someday” </i>thought was my heart grasping at the illusion of
having a daughter as my ultimate fulfillment – my heaven on earth. Really, when
I looked deeper into those dark corners and exposed my hopes for what they
were, I saw the truth. I had been worshiping an idea of future perfection. I
had been setting my sights on an ideal that may happen in the days to come and
expecting that the fulfillment would bring me perfect joy, delight, and
happiness. <o:p></o:p></span><br>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I’ve found myself here before – worship, such an easy thing
to misplace – idolatry, popping up in my life again. In my focus on my “<i>Maybe Someday,”</i> I was disregarding the
one thing (Person) who is the very fulfillment of that piece of my heart that
is missing. Jesus gives me himself – wholly and freely. Having a daughter could
never fill that void.<o:p></o:p></span><br>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">In the past, it was my desire for a husband – then life would be perfect. <o:p></o:p></span><br>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">If I had a child – then I would feel whole.<o:p></o:p></span><br>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">If we owned our own home – then I could feel like I could
rest.<o:p></o:p></span><br>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">If only I didn’t have to work and could stay at home – then
I could find my identity.<o:p></o:p></span><br>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">If I could just lose those pounds – then I would feel
confident.<o:p></o:p></span><br>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">But each time, when the desire was fulfilled, I still found
myself longing for the next best thing. And in the moments that my “<i>Maybe Someday” </i>didn’t come to pass, I
felt jaded, depressed, and overlooked.<o:p></o:p></span><br>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">My friends, our hearts were made for eternity. We were
fashioned with a longing, a longing that cannot be fulfilled in completeness
this side of heaven. We desire beauty, peace, rest, comfort, perfect love, and
so much more. But these things, these gifts that we have been privileged to
experience on this tangible earth that we walk are only an imitation at best of
what our heart desperately needs. And Christ as the giver has provided that in
himself, in the giving of his Holy Spirit to walk with us. Each time we settle
for anything less, we are like the children C.S. Lewis talks about who settle
for playing with mud pies when they have been offered and ocean vacation <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/702-it-would-seem-that-our-lord-finds-our-desires-not" target="_blank">(TheWeight of Glory)</a>. <o:p></o:p></span><br>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Maybe your desires aren’t like mine. Your <i>“Maybe Someday” </i>might be about escaping
from a painful relationship, finding financial stability, desiring healing for
a loved one, finding a close friend, seeing that child turn back to the faith,
or God easing your own physical pain. None of these desires are wrong in and of
themselves. It’s when we allow our hearts to idolize our “<i>Maybe Someday”</i> and expect that result to bring about our salvation
or ultimate joy that we step over the line. <o:p></o:p></span><br>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Jesus is here, longing to bless us far more abundantly than we could ask or imagine (<a href="https://biblehub.com/ephesians/3-20.htm" target="_blank">Eph. 3:20</a>). Your “<i>Maybe
Someday” </i>may be fulfilled, and God may choose to gift you with a taste of
himself in that way, but please don’t worship that gift. Glorify the giver!<o:p></o:p></span><br>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Or like me, you may sit with empty hands and a “<i>Maybe Someday” </i>that will never be. Don’t
let that pull your heart away from the only one who can fill it! We must
realize that what our hearts long to experience maybe someday is not something
we can find this side of eternity. Anything less than Jesus Christ, himself
will leave us longing for more and cause us to idolize that for which we long. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<script src="https://assets.pinterest.com/js/pinit.js" type="text/javascript"></script><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Jesus offers himself. He is our <a href="https://biblehub.com/ephesians/2-14.htm" target="_blank">perfect peace</a> – even when
life is not perfect. He <a href="https://biblehub.com/james/4-6.htm" target="_blank">gives us grace</a> to do what is right – even when it is
the last things we want to do. His <a href="https://biblehub.com/2_corinthians/12-9.htm" target="_blank">strength is made perfect</a> in our weakness.
And when I am left with longings unfulfilled, he shows me that he is more than
enough. </span><br>
<o:p></o:p></div>
Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-54343023699925993822019-05-07T21:46:00.001-04:002019-05-07T22:12:10.867-04:00It's Mother Day: Please Treat me Like a Goddess!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxg43BB1rhhjZlpzjUVSP_uGzaIdv7_dYaEO5Jc2lx_KeVI-y7vWl_LpKzwjtzUQwZPDw15_nr3S-y_z2zPMyXgUm4ItsTFcsODHjLEejGfjZF69hwU5ahNEZBnFASrEzTiOTBAVN42r2D/s1600/croissant-2039386_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxg43BB1rhhjZlpzjUVSP_uGzaIdv7_dYaEO5Jc2lx_KeVI-y7vWl_LpKzwjtzUQwZPDw15_nr3S-y_z2zPMyXgUm4ItsTFcsODHjLEejGfjZF69hwU5ahNEZBnFASrEzTiOTBAVN42r2D/s640/croissant-2039386_1920.jpg" width="640"></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">The alarm rang waking me from my slumber. I turned over and
silenced it then sighed. It was Mother’s Day. I now had four little boys who
were under my care. I smiled at the privilege of being called their mom. As I
sat up and stretched, my mind filled with curious thought of what my husband
had planned in order to celebrate me. Maybe flowers? Chocolates? A hot
breakfast? I knew he would be heading to work soon—that’s the life of a firefighter—and
I had already psyched myself up for taking four little boys to church on my
own on Mother’s day. But I just knew he probably had done something to make me
feel special. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<b id="docs-internal-guid-1c1ae358-7fff-82a4-11b3-a093ff3477bd" style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br></span></b>
<h3 style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">A Disappointing Surprise</span></span></h3>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I put on my house shoes and padded to the kitchen just as I
heard the garage door close. I glanced around. Everything looked fairly normal.
Standing on my tiptoes, I peered across the room to the dining room table.
Nothing. I heard the rumble of my husband’s truck as he pulled out, and my
heart fell to my stomach. No flowers. No chocolates. Nothing even set out for
breakfast. To top it all off, he hadn’t even kissed me before he left or wished
me happy Mother’s Day. Heat rose in my face as anger and great disappointment
filled my chest. Forget it, I didn’t care anyway (or at least I tried to
convince myself of such.) Time to be strong and get my boys ready for church! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Over the next hour, I bathed, fed, dressed and readied four
boys (one still being a nursing infant) and myself for church. We were ready to
go, and I glanced at the clock. I still had ten minutes. Fantastic! I realized
I needed a moment to reset from the stress and disappointment of the morning,
so I set the boys up with a movie and retreated to my room. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br></span></b>
<h3 style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">A Moment to Reset</span></span></h3>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">As I quieted my heart, I breathed deeply. I let my mind roam
over what my expectations had been for the day. I work so hard all the time.
Wasn’t Mother’s Day supposed to be a day to celebrate me? It was rare to hear
gratitude throughout the year. My oldest was only five; he wasn’t aware of the
sacrifice of motherhood, but didn’t I deserve at least some acknowledgement
from my husband on today of all days? I followed David’s pattern from the
Psalms “Pour out your heart to him, God is a refuge for us” <a href="https://biblehub.com/psalms/62-8.htm" target="_blank">(Psalm 62:8)</a> and
allowed my heart and my eyes to leak all the emotions of the morning. As I
expressed my heart to my loving Jesus, He gently put His finger on a soft spot
and pointed out a dangerous line that I was toeing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">It was Mother’s Day. It was also a Sunday. I was getting
myself and my kids ready to head to church – to worship the God of the Universe
with fellow believers. And here I was, sulking that I had not received
accolades for my position as a mother. How sacrilegious! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br></span></b>
<h3 style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Idolatries in My Past</span></span></h3>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">In the past, God had used various circumstances, speakers,
or events to point out areas of idolatry in my life. Now, this didn’t look like
the “household gods” described in the old testament. I hadn’t created a shrine
for an idol and practiced worship in a formal sense. However, there had been
areas of my life where I would find my comfort in things or activities rather
than in God. For instance, I’ve always struggled with dealing with strong
emotions, so I found it distracting and satisfying to grab a big bowl of ice
cream or indulge in binge watching a favorite show or losing myself in a good
novel. None of these things are wrong in themselves, but none of these things
could fill or heal my heart the way Jesus could. And when I would run to these
things first, I was putting them in the place of God. I was worshiping ice
cream for how it made me feel. I was worshiping TV shows for how they helped me
relax. I was worshiping novels for how they helped me escape. As Jesus had
gently made me aware of these things in the past, I was able to work through
confession and surrender and walk in new ways of seeking Him first to fill
those emotional needs when I was struggling.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br></span></b>
<h3 style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">A Step Further: and not in a Good Direction</span></span></h3>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">This time it was different. This time, I had taken a step
further. I wasn’t worshiping some item or idea. <b>I wanted to be the one my
husband and sons were worshiping!</b> My heart broke at the truth of what God was
showing me. The reason I was so angry about no flowers, no chocolates, no
breakfast, no “Happy Mother’s Day” was because I wanted to be the little “g”
god in my family’s lives. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br></span></b>
<h3 style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Yet He Delights in Me!</span></span></h3>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">In those last few moments before I ushered my sons out the
door to church, I got down on my knees and confessed my pride, my arrogance,
and my idolatry against my King. I was so grateful for His gentle conviction
and began to praise him for who he was rather than claiming praise for what I
had done. And Jesus spoke back to my heart: <i>Hannah,
I will never worship you, just as no one else should. But I want you to know
that I delight in you, even when no one else does. <a href="https://biblehub.com/zephaniah/3-17.htm" target="_blank">(Zephaniah 3:17)</a> </i>At that
moment, the chocolates and the flowers and the accolades no longer mattered.
The King of the universe found delight in me!</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br></span></b>
<h3 style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; font-family: Arial; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-size: large;">Worshipping Him</span></span></h3>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I loaded the boys up and headed to church with a renewed
joy. The morning wasn’t perfect. It was raining. I had three of my four boys
splashing in puddles as we walked in the door. The infant cried through parts
of Sunday school and church, getting the boys in the car was challenging, no
one made me lunch, I didn’t get a nap, and my boys still didn’t realize it was
Mother’s Day. But this Sunday truly was a delightful Mother’s day – because I
chose to worship the God who made me a mother, and I realized that he delighted
in me and my motherhood. And that’s what really mattered!</span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;">(By the way, the following day when my husband
got off shift, he did wish me “Happy Mother’s Day” and bought me some flowers
too!)</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<br>Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-2887396840434033612019-04-05T15:10:00.001-04:002019-04-05T15:10:30.709-04:00The Ultimate in Unplanned: And How to Respond <div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<i><b><span style="font-size: large;">"For you formed my inward parts, </span></b></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<i><b><span style="font-size: large;">you knitted me together in my mother's womb. </span></b></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<i><b><span style="font-size: large;">I praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made." </span></b></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<i><b><span style="font-size: large;">Psalm 139:13-14</span></b></i></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5EQGesVXEfUv-M3GJhRGEECtAyUbhC-OdcXoYrUJ9pYTbRimRVw4wX3M9LSHFXYIxYyDLwTkCSVha7Uvwl34zFBzzKyGTXZ45JmSAxUBEAuTadUXc2bB0gVUmpa3t0OTSLzmV4HW2g8yB/s1600/accident-3991870_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="858" data-original-width="1600" height="342" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5EQGesVXEfUv-M3GJhRGEECtAyUbhC-OdcXoYrUJ9pYTbRimRVw4wX3M9LSHFXYIxYyDLwTkCSVha7Uvwl34zFBzzKyGTXZ45JmSAxUBEAuTadUXc2bB0gVUmpa3t0OTSLzmV4HW2g8yB/s640/accident-3991870_1920.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I saw the movie “Unplanned” last night. It’s one of the most
poignant and thought-provoking films I have see in a long time. It’s not an
easy one to watch, but it exposes truth – truth that is so desperately needed
in our culture right now. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I feel the need to write. I feel the Spirit leading, and the
time is ripe to get words out to those who are willing to read them The movie got me thinking and
convicted my heart of complacency on my own part. </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<h3>
<span style="font-size: large;">The Ultimate Unplanned Pregnancy</span></h3>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">The ultimate in unplanned pregnancies was predestined before the
beginning of the world. I cannot help but think of Mary, the mother of Jesus.
She was a teenager – maybe 13-15 years old. She was engaged to be married, yet
a virgin. Talk about shock when she hears from the angel that she will become
pregnant. That might be expected for a young girl fooling around, it may be a
surprise when her methods of “prevention” don't prevent. But Mary had to ask
the question, HOW CAN THIS BE since I am a virgin? (See Luke 1:26-38) It defied logic. Talk about
an unplanned pregnancy. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I’m sure Mary, after submitting herself to the will of God
so gracefully, started wondering how she was going to tell her parents. What
would Joseph think? There was a law that a woman pregnant outside of marriage
should be stoned. Was she in danger? I’m sure she felt alone. Frightened –
terrified even. She knew they would all find out eventually – when she didn’t
separate herself as the law required when her time of woman came each month. I’m
sure she questioned whether this was the right time for her to become a mother.
She probably doubted whether she had what it would take to raise a son – much
less the son of God! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">And I started musing over the fact that God would choose a
virgin to bear his son. Outside of the necessary fact of Jesus being separate
from Adam’s seed, I wonder if God chose a virgin to give us a beautiful picture
of grace in the midst of an “unplanned pregnancy.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<h3>
<span style="font-size: large;">What if it Happened Today?</span></h3>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I cannot help but wonder what Mary would endure if today in
our culture, in our country, she found herself in those circumstances – A
member of a minority group, a very young teenager, she finds out she is
pregnant and no one knows who the father is, part of a religious community that
scorns shame and embarrassment. Would she find the support she needed? Or would
she more likely be taken to a planned parenthood clinic to “take care of the
problem?” <i>We want our daughter to have a
life and opportunities. No one will accept her, much less marry her if she has
a child at her age. She’s not ready to become a mother. </i>Her parents might
think. Would they see an easy out in order to protect their daughter and
themselves? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">What about her friends? Would they encourage her to take a
simple pill so her life can get back to normal? Would they repeat the lies in
her ears that it’s just a blob of tissue and cannot feel anything at this
point?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<h3>
<span style="font-size: large;">How Would I Respond?</span></h3>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">What about me? Would I pray for her, encourage her, support
her, take her to a Pregnancy care center, help her look into options and love
her like Christ? Or like so many abortions happening in my neighboring cities
each day, would I ignore it? <i>It’s not my
problem. I cannot solve a national crisis. It doesn’t affect me. It’s not my
responsibility.</i> And some might argue that scripture isn’t even clear on the
matter of abortion. I really appreciate the perspective drawn out in <a href="https://crossexamined.org/abortion-and-the-god-molech" target="_blank">this article</a> to address that issue specifically.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">The problem is, it would affect me and everyone else on the
planet who ever lived. Getting rid of that "blob of tissue" would have destroyed
the Savior of the world and denied the possibility of salvation through Christ.
Each “Unplanned” pregnancy has the potential to change the world! (This is not
denying the sovereignty of God and that his plans could not be thwarted. Using
this example is simply to show how God can even use unexpected circumstances to
bring himself ultimate glory.)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
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<h3>
<span style="font-size: large;">God's Grace through Joseph</span></h3>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">But Joseph, being a righteous man, did not want to publicly
shame Mary. He put her away quietly and protected both her dignity and was a
crucial instrument in protecting the innocent, beautiful life of the Son of
God. He didn’t listen to the culture. He didn’t fall prey to the expectations
of his neighbors or his Rabbi. He didn’t follow the requirements so stringently
placed on him by the “law.” And I’m sure he was ridiculed, probably lost
friends and maybe even some of his standing as a Jewish man in Nazareth. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">In so many ways, the ultimate in unplanned pregnancies is
set before us as a beautiful example of how we should fight for and protect all
unplanned pregnancies. We should be righteous people of God like Joseph was and
be willing to accept the criticism and inconvenience of moving against the tide
of our culture. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<h3>
<span style="font-size: large;">Ignorant No More</span></h3>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">We cannot ignore this issue any more. More than likely, each
one of us has been touched in one way or another by the issue of abortion. The
blood of millions of babies are crying out to us from the ground, and what are
we doing about it? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">If you’re like me, for the longest time, I simply ignored
it. I wasn’t the one working in the clinic killing these babies. I wasn’t
convincing women this was their right. I wasn’t involved in an unplanned
pregnancy of my own or my friends’. So I wasn’t guilty (or so I thought.) Yet, as I watched the
movie last night, God convicted my heart that <u>I am guilty</u> – very guilty. My
silence, my ignorance, my lack of prayer is an overarching acceptance of the
way things are in our country. I am held responsible for the massive slaughter
of infants in our country. And I am sure that if I stay silent, I will be held
responsible in part when I stand before God in heaven one day – as will you!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<h3>
<span style="font-size: large;">What Can We Do?</span></h3>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">So where do we go from here? How do we begin to go against
the tide of our culture? How do we rise and fight with all that is in us
against this horror?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<ol>
<li><span style="font-size: large; text-indent: -0.25in;">Educate ourselves – see the movie Unplanned.
<a href="https://www.unplannedfilm.com/" target="_blank">Theaters and Showtimes</a> Not only does this movie open our eyes to the truth
behind the abortion industry, but it also shows the power of prayer, love, and
grace. Each time we buy a movie ticket to a show like this, we are telling the
theaters that we want this and movies like this playing in our community. If you’ve
seen it already, take a friend that might be impacted as well!<br /></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: large;">PRAY! Nothing moves the heart of God like His
people on their knees. Check out <a href="https://40daysforlife.com/" target="_blank">40 Days for Life</a> if you’re interested in
something organized or make a commitment on your own or with a group of friends
to spend a certain number of days crying out to God on behalf of the unborn
babies who are at risk in our country.<br /></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: large;">Find your local pregnancy care centers. Donate
money or time to come along side of them. They are feet on the ground caring for women with unplanned pregnancies. These centers need our financial
support, our prayer support, volunteers, donations of goods and so much more.<br /></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: large;">Don’t condemn a friend who has had an abortion.
Help her to find the help that she needs. Post abortive syndrome is real, its
hard, its ugly. She doesn’t need more guilt. She needs our love poured out in
abundant mercy. If you've had an abortion, <a href="https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/article/healing-trauma-abortion/" target="_blank">God's grace is enough!</a> You are greatly loved! Also, if you know someone involved in the abortion industry,
love on them, pray for them and if they want out, refer them to <a href="https://abortionworker.com/" target="_blank">and then there were none.</a><br /></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: large;">Learn how to defend your position on being
pro-life without initiating religious debate Here’s my 60 second spill: <br /><br />"The
American College of Pediatricians (physician journal backed by scientific evidence) issued an <a href="https://www.acpeds.org/the-college-speaks/position-statements/life-issues/when-human-life-begins" target="_blank">article</a> in
2014 stating that life begins at conception. Our
<a href="https://www.constitution.org/us_doi.pdf" target="_blank">Declaration of Independence</a> states that all men [persons – members of the
species homo sapiens] are created equal and as such are entitled to the pursuit
of life, liberty and happiness. As a conscience bearing adult, that means that
I have a responsibility to stand for those who cannot stand for themselves,
whether the unborn, the elderly, or the incapacitated. Their lives matter!" (outside of my personal religious convictions, this is my statement on being
pro-life.)<br /></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: large;">Be a Joseph to a friend in dealing with an unplanned pregnancy. Walk in grace.
Support her. Help her to find the resources she needs whether it is finances,
lodging, an adoption agency or simply a listening ear. Assure her she is not
alone and that God’s grace is enough even now. Mary did it, Jesus was born and
changed the course of history!</span></li>
</ol>
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I challenge you as I challenge myself – don’t remain silent
any longer! Our prayers, our love, and showing the grace of our merciful God
can enact change if we are willing to take stand for the truth!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br /><script src="https://assets.pinterest.com/js/pinit.js" type="text/javascript"></script>Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-48938500327961392822019-02-24T15:23:00.002-05:002019-02-24T15:25:22.826-05:00When "Why?" Is the Burning Question in My Heart<div class="MsoNormal">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIq_ggCVzNpzyXCnrvzB-MIRLBgzQ9Ie3WpcnOaP0Ms40tWFeLdSutzTsNa40Jb3dYrzwYARkIufTi7lBCYU3RX4bJS4UBVxz18pjvyigwg-yBjl5biNBhWXBUlvxR2mzvZfSQLpLyyOmr/s1600/question-mark-1872634_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="880" data-original-width="1600" height="352" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIq_ggCVzNpzyXCnrvzB-MIRLBgzQ9Ie3WpcnOaP0Ms40tWFeLdSutzTsNa40Jb3dYrzwYARkIufTi7lBCYU3RX4bJS4UBVxz18pjvyigwg-yBjl5biNBhWXBUlvxR2mzvZfSQLpLyyOmr/s640/question-mark-1872634_1920.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">The other night, I held my husband as he cried – and I mean
cried – (as did I) as the father in Like Arrows came in to talk to his
daughter, the bride. Another hit to our hearts and realization of a moment that
we will miss as parents. Though I’ve grieved over not having a little girl, I
still have questions. Questions that I’m not sure I’ll ever have the answer to.<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"> “Why?” (I hate it
when my own kids ask that question) I know well the reality that God sees all
and does all things well. He doesn’t owe me an answer in any way. Yet the
question lingers as a winter that seems to never end. When I consider my “why”
question, I realize it actually goes deeper than just those three small letters.
It’s connected to my heart. When I peel back the layers, the question looks
more like:<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"> “Did I do something
wrong?”</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> “Do I not have what it takes to raise a
daughter?”</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> “Am I not woman enough myself to set an
example for a little girl?” <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Just putting voice to those questions brings up another
layer of wounds on my identity and beauty. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">The world constantly whispers (and sometimes screams) these
scars onto our hearts. “You’re not enough.” “You’re too much.” “You can’t
handle it.” “No one can handle you.” “Your heart is too deep.” “You’re unwanted.”
“You’re ugly, mean, rude, selfish, etc.” On and on they go. Maybe these words
came through our parent’s mouths or maybe simply in a cold shoulder when we
would get emotional over a seemingly trivial issue. Maybe a sibling was the
favored one and we were ignored. Maybe our arrival came at a time of intense
pressure in our parents lives. Maybe our parents were wonderful, and we had a
genuinely loving relationship with them, but we heard these words (verbally or
insinuated) from a friend at school, from a teacher, a grandparent, a
boyfriend, or an employer. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">We respond in one of two ways to these wounds. We get
stronger, determined that we will never be hurt in that way again. Maybe anger
is the coverup, or makeup, clothes, the way we carry ourselves. Or we walk
around as wounded, hurting shells of people who live in constant anxiety. We
tiptoe around people who present threats, we try to please and make everyone
happy and do everything in our power to not rock the boat. Ultimately, at the
root of both of these responses is fear – fear that we might be found out, that
someone might see though our guise, that we will be seen for what we are –
either too much or not enough!<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">But God is loving. 1 John states that He IS Love! And
perfect love drives out all fear. There is no fear in love because fear has to
do with punishment. That’s it. The reason I fear, the reason we fear, is that
we fear the repercussions of being found out. Will we be reprimanded again or
told how we should buck up? Will that person feel like we are too much to
handle and walk away? If God really sees our hearts, will even he be repulsed
and draw back in disgust? What kind of punishment will we incur if we’re found
out to not be who we should be? <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">That is at the root of my question: Is God punishing me by
not giving me a daughter because of something I’ve done or not done?<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">As I gain clarity on the reality of my question, I realize
it reveals a distorted view about who God is. And that distorted view reflects
on my own identity and radiates into my wounds. We have an enemy who prowls
around seeking someone to destroy (1 Peter 5:8). And he does it as a deceiver,
the father of lies. Isn’t that how this whole messed up world got started in
the first place? One woman taking a solid bite of one lie. Oh, how I don’t want
to be her. I want to see through the lies and believe the truth. Here are the
lies that I’ve been tempted to chew on recently. . . <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Lie:</b> If I don’t measure up, God will withhold his love,
grace and gifts.<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Truth:</b> Romans 5:8 – “But God demonstrates his own love
toward us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” I didn’t
measure up to begin with. I was as far from deserving or worthy of his
sacrifice as anyone, and yet He still showered me with his love and gave the
ultimate gift – His life for mine. John 15 states that there is no greater love
than when a man will lay down his life for his friend. Amazing Grace! <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Lie:</b> If I mess up, God will be out to get me and punish me.<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Truth:</b> Psalm 103:8 – “The Lord is merciful and gracious,
slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love. He will not always chide, nor
will he keep his anger forever. He does not deal with us according to our sins,
nor repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above
the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him, as far as
the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.” I
am so grateful that God’s love is not dependent on my performance. I can rest
assured, that when I mess up (and I will) he is like the father of the Prodigal
Son, standing there with open arms waiting to welcome me back, full of love and
forgiveness.<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Lie:</b> If I get too emotional or struggle to trust God, He
will be overwhelmed by me and withdraw his presence.<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Truth:</b> Psalm 34:18 – “The Lord is close to the
brokenhearted. He saves those who are crushed in spirit.” I love the Psalms for
the reality and spectrum of emotions they reveal. David was considered a man
after God’s own heart, and yet he openly expressed to God feelings of anger,
rage, sadness, despair, depression, doubt, fear, and so many more. God longs for
us to pour out our hearts to him and be our refuge (Psalm 62). And I love how
David goes on to express that even when those closest to him abandons him (his
father and mother), God invites him to come close (Psalm 27:10) And Paul
expresses in Romans 8 that there is nothing in heaven or earth, good or bad
that can ever separate us from God’s love (vs. 31-39). What reassurance that I’m
never too much for my Heavenly Father!<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">It’s so easy to get set in our patterns of “stinkin’ thinkin’”
as a friend of mine likes to call it. These lies are made to sound so much like
truth. Just like Eve facing the serpent, we begin to think, <i>You know, maybe he’s right. Maybe God hasn’t
been telling us the truth all along. </i>But my friends, I have seen first hand
the devastation that can be brought by buying into these lies. Eve took a bite,
and all the future was forever changed. I want to rise above this way of
thinking. I want to learn to see the truth in the midst of the lies and trust
the goodness of my heavenly father, no matter what.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">In order to do this, I must learn to speak truth to my heart - for my heart is deceitful. Truth is found exclusively in the Word of God. The only way we will be able to fight the lies of the enemy is by keeping the truth close at hand (buckled around our waist) and hidden in our hearts.<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">My "why" question can be brought before the throne of God. He's not afraid of my deepest questions, fears, or wounds. As a loving Father, he will, by His Spirit, gently guide me into all truth. And when I know the truth, the truth will set me free!</span></div>
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Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-25667844164865329402019-02-13T18:57:00.001-05:002019-02-13T18:57:37.567-05:00When the Right Choice is the Hard Choice and Threatens to Break Your Heart<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTL-VmS4d2STJOMq-Z-7BCD_McEke4yvMzkRRjCH6KYeJpBlChg20KCmTUR-dOgR6TUt2mqd2qdTmKe1vw3yc7VhtS2zZh3rcmKjUgBRHAlznMLL_PqryGw1HjaxZ9BbXgjJp0SS5SC2uV/s1600/sad-2182545_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTL-VmS4d2STJOMq-Z-7BCD_McEke4yvMzkRRjCH6KYeJpBlChg20KCmTUR-dOgR6TUt2mqd2qdTmKe1vw3yc7VhtS2zZh3rcmKjUgBRHAlznMLL_PqryGw1HjaxZ9BbXgjJp0SS5SC2uV/s640/sad-2182545_1920.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">For us, that choice had to do with our dog. “It’s only a
dog.” Some might mutter while others accuse “She was your dog! How could you?”
Yesterday we told our dog goodbye and watched her walk away with her new owner
to her new home. The tears fill my eyes now even as I write that. I never
wanted it to be this way. I had so many dreams of her being our family dog
forever.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">We didn’t come to the decision to re-home our dog lightly. It
took months, maybe even years to really realize the truth that we were no
longer capable of giving her everything she needed. Ultimately, after seeking
God and talking together, my husband and I knew it was time for our Gracie-girl
to find a new home – one that could give her much more attention than we could
at this phase in our lives. But the truth didn’t stop the ache in my heart.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">We all make hard choices, some more difficult than others.
Maybe for you it was saying goodbye to a child, knowing someone else could
provide them with a more nurturing home. Maybe it was letting go of a
relationship you knew wasn’t healthy or best. Maybe it was choosing to say “enough”
to medical intervention and watching your loved one pass away peacefully. Maybe
your hard choice was a single occurrence of turning down a solid job opportunity
to choose your family instead, or maybe you’ve said no time after time to the
advances of a co-worker choosing to honor your marriage commitment even though
it’s hard. Your choice may have been like ours to re-home a pet or say goodbye permanently
so they no longer have to suffer. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">As believers in Christ, we are called to look for wisdom
then to obey, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy. Whatever your choice, I’m sure
it has touched your heart as ours has mine. What do you do when the right
choice is hard? What do you do when it threatens to break your heart? Here are five
things that have helped me. I hope they help you too!</span></div>
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<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></b></div>
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<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Don’t self-medicate.</span></b><span style="font-size: large; text-indent: -0.25in;"> When my heart hurts, I don’t
like it. I’m uncomfortable, and it doesn’t feel good. The first thing my flesh
wants to run to are fillers and distractions – a big bowl of ice cream, a
novel, a TV show or movie, a nap, lots of dark chocolate, maybe even a run if I
have that much pent up energy. Now none of these things are wrong in their own
light. God gives us all gifts for our enjoyment and delight in him. The problem
comes when I run to those things first and only, when I look to the food, the
drinks, the entertainment to fill me back up again.</span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
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<span style="font-size: large;">The only source of our life is Christ. “In Him
was life” (John 1:4). “In Him we live and move and have our being” (Acts
17:28). “I have come that they may have life and have it to the full” (John
10:10). Anything we look to in order to bring us life other than Christ himself
is a cheap substitute and ultimately becomes an idol in our lives.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-size: large;">Staci Eldridge addresses this problem in
her book <u><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Captivating-Revised-Updated-Unveiling-Mystery/dp/1400200385/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1550100536&sr=8-1&keywords=Captivating" target="_blank">Captivating</a></u>. “. . . none of these really satisfy, and so we
find ourselves trying to fill the remaining emptiness with our little
indulgences (we call them ‘bad habits’). Brent Curtis calls them our ‘little
affairs of the heart.’ They are what we give our hearts away to instead of
giving them to the heart of God” (57). The substitutes and self-medicating may
make us feel better for a while, but ultimately, they will leave us empty and
as unfulfilled as before. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-size: large;">Instead of taking my heart and hiding it or
distracting my heart from the pain, I have to realize that God longs to have my
heart – All of it! “You will seek me and you will find me when you seek for me
with all your heart” (Jeremiah 29:13). God cares about our aches and pains no
matter how little they may seem to someone else, and he longs for us to pour
out our heart to him. (Psalm 62:8)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Don’t listen to accusations</span></b><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">.</span><span style="font-size: large;"> Everyone in the
world has an opinion about your life – especially everyone on social media. You
would not believe some of the things that people said about our decision as we
were looking for a new home for our dog. People who didn’t even know me felt
the freedom to condemn and insult. (That’s another post for another day) It
hurt! It cut deeply. The saying goes, “Sticks and stones may break my bones but
words will never hurt me.” So. Not. True. Bone heal, and they heal stronger.
Hearts almost always carry scars from words rashly spoken.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Our enemy likes to take these accusations
along with our own hurt and exhaustion and twist them into tempting morsels for
us to chew on. I have to think the prophet Elijah was in a similar boat being
the only prophet to stand for God in the midst of a crooked and perverse
generation. Right after he called down fire from God to the alter on the
mountain and prayed for it to rain, he found himself in the wilderness so
depressed and discouraged that he asked God to let him die. Jezebel was after
him. He probably felt like everyone was after him. But after a nap, and as he
sought God, he found him. It wasn’t in the earthquake or the whirlwind or the
fire, but afterward, he heard it – the still small voice speaking truth to his
heart. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Our world, our culture can be so loud.
Comments can echo around our head and heart until they seem like the only truths
left. But it’s not in the noise of our social media contacts that we are going
to hear words of truth from the mouth of the one who assured, “I am the way and
the truth. . .” (John 14:6). Jesus spoke of the Holy Spirit in John 16:13, “He
will guide you into all truth.” Many times, I wonder if the Holy Spirit is
constantly speaking quietly to our heart, but we drown him out with our own
versions of earthquakes, whirlwinds, and fires. If we step away from the noise
and quiet our hearts, we will hear the tender voice of the Holy Spirit speaking
truth and comfort to our burdened hearts.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Speak truth to yourself.</span></b><span style="font-size: large; text-indent: -0.25in;"> Sometimes even after tuning
out the noise of the world, I still find it hard to hear the truth. Satan, the father
of lies, is crafty and cunning and will twist nearly anything to fit his own
devices in continuing to steal our joy, kill our hope and defeat our
effectiveness for the glory of God.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">I think that may be one of the reasons that
the belt of truth is mentioned first as we put on the armor of God. For a long
time, I wondered why Paul included a belt in the armor. It is neither an
offensive nor defensive weapon. But the more I pondered and prayed, I realized
the centrality of this piece of armor to every other piece we are commanded to
take up in Ephesians 6. A belt is crucial to a garment in order to keep it
tightly secured. Could you imagine fighting a battle while your pants are
falling down around your ankles? The other crucial job of a belt is to provide
a place to store your weapons. In the same way, truth is absolutely essential
in our fight against our enemy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-size: large;">When I find it hard to hear the truth, I
must seek it out in the Word of God! David did the same thing commanding his
heart to put his hope in God! (Psalm 42). Truth about who God is, who I am, and
what He has promised prove to be a healing balm to my soul and ultimately
defeats the deception of the devil.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Get outside.</span></b><span style="font-size: large;"> When my heart is hurting and all I
want to do is close myself up in my room, sometimes the healthiest thing I can
do is to take a walk. Getting outside reminds me that the world is so much
bigger than me and my problems. Seeing trees, birds, flowers (and yes, even
snow) can bring hope to my heart that even in the midst of this cruel world,
God is still working his redeeming plan. And exposing my heart to beauty
reminds me to be thankful for the little gifts of grace that God provides.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<span style="font-size: large;">We see season after season how fall turns
to winter then winter to spring. “He has made everything beautiful in its time”
(Ecclesiastes 3:11). He then will also take my heart and make something
beautiful once again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Breathe.</span></b><span style="font-size: large;"> I don’t mean deep breathing or yoga.
Throughout the Bible, the same words for Holy Spirit are “Ruach” or “Pneuma”
meaning breath. I have to remind myself that I am not my own life source.
Christ is. The vibrancy and beauty of my heart can only come through His power.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast">
<span style="font-size: large;">We sang a song on Sunday. “It’s your breath
in our lungs. So we pour out our praise.” <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uHz0w-HG4iU" target="_blank">(listen here)</a> I had never realized the truth
of that chorus in that way before. It is only by the power of the Holy Spirit flowing
through us that we can utter our Amen to the glory of God (2 Corinthians 1:20).
Try as I might, I cannot praise God in the midst of the storm unless I am
sustained by the very nature of who he is in me. I can do nothing on my own,
but I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (Philippians 4:13).
It’s His Breath in our lungs. Let him pour out His praise through you.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast">
<span style="font-size: large;">This life is hard, and decisions that we must make are not
without their effect on our hearts. But friends, if you are in the midst of your
own hard right now, would you take my hand and walk with me as we make choices even
in the middle of the hard stuff? Let’s journey this road together for two are
better than one and a cord of three strands is not easily broken (Ecclesiastes
4:9). I would love to hear how I can be praying for you in the midst of your
hard thing! May God hold your hearts.</span></div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
<script src="https://assets.pinterest.com/js/pinit.js" type="text/javascript"></script>Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-9981537510637217742019-02-03T11:53:00.000-05:002019-02-03T11:53:11.395-05:00Good Grief: Why I Can't Simply "Count It All Joy"<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIoGmibW__T-rxR7yUhED-t3bOOw3Rt_D7IrcfDaV-67wQnuM3NXmjq-QnZzvLQLXBbVbg-B7fdVZg_5R8x16ktURN_Yo_hGQcIfRgXZCFmqPXHCc3Ai23gOvCaL-3ddJe4HVlfO7dS2DS/s1600/smiley-2979107_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="900" data-original-width="1600" height="358" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIoGmibW__T-rxR7yUhED-t3bOOw3Rt_D7IrcfDaV-67wQnuM3NXmjq-QnZzvLQLXBbVbg-B7fdVZg_5R8x16ktURN_Yo_hGQcIfRgXZCFmqPXHCc3Ai23gOvCaL-3ddJe4HVlfO7dS2DS/s640/smiley-2979107_1920.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">“Count
it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know
that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness” (James 1:2-3 ESV).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Growing
up in the church, I heard this passage oft quoted when someone was grieved or
struggling. Unfortunately, it’s a common theme among believers that grief over
heartache or suffering must be short-lived if we are to prove our trust in God.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">When
we encounter trials, we may find it acceptable to shed a few tears, but then
(if we are really mature) we pull up our “big girl pants” and push the feelings
away under the title of “Trusting that God has a plan” and that “He will work
all things out for good.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">I
have been exposed to this process so repetitively that it has become ingrained
in my mind and heart as a pattern to follow. Deep emotions are uncomfortable.
They are uncomfortable to me and uncomfortable for others. If I’m really
trusting God, I won’t continue to grieve, right?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Ironically,
I don’t believe that’s what James intended from these verses. He goes on to say
that we should allow steadfastness (or perseverance) have its full effect so
that we may be mature and complete and lacking nothing. This perseverance does
not mean (as many like to translate) pushing forward in our faith and pushing
our emotions away. In the Greek, it is translated “hupomone’” – “hypo” meaning
under and “meno” meaning to remain or endure. Strongs HELPS Word-studies goes
on to explain that this is a God-empowered ability given to those who believe
in him to “’remain (endure) under’ the challenges He allots in life.”
Obviously, we are not being instructed to remove ourselves from the trial by
our own efforts of trusting in God.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Peter
echoes James’ sentiments in 1 Peter chapter 1, but I believe, though oft less
quoted, he is more clear in the way he communicates. Peter begins by laying a
foundational vision of the hope we have in Christ, the power and grace of his
glory and the promises we can rest assured of. He then continues. “In this you
rejoice, [comparable to James’ admonition to count it all joy] though now for a
little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials” (1 Peter
1:6). Hold on a second. Peter brings up the reality of the emotion in the midst
of the trials. We have been grieved! This word “grief” in the Greek is
“lupeo” – which means to experience deep emotional pain, sorrow, intense
sadness. (Ladies, it’s the same word that’s used to describe the pain of
childbirth – how is that for a visual?)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">But
Peter doesn’t stop there. He continues that this grief (not the “choice” to
count it all joy) is so that the tested genuineness of our faith may bring
Christ all the praise and the glory. And that’s our ultimate aim, right? As
believers, we are called to image and glorify Christ on this earth – not
ourselves. I’ve found that if I put forth my own effort to trust God, I am
denying the power of God in my life and, in my pride, believing that I have
what it takes to live the life of faith. However, if I’m willing to
patiently endure the process of sorrow (by the grace that God supplies), to
walk through each phase with him, I will experience his comfort, his peace, his
presence in ways that were never possible when I was choosing to “count it all
joy” and remove myself from feeling those deep emotions. Ultimately, He will
get the glory – not me – when he brings me to the other side full of
inexpressible and glorious joy!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">This
concept goes against everything that has been ingrained in me for so long.
Grief typically = tears. And I don’t like tears so much – at least not my own.
Tears, in our culture, are translated as weakness. I’m a strong person if I can
hold myself together. Now, tears are okay for babies, for kids, but I am a
grown up. I shouldn’t cry, should I?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">I
came across this video as I was processing through this concept, and it opened
my eyes to why crying may be a positive and not a negative. <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=89P2sn-wWBU"><span style="color: #1155cc;">The
Healing Power of Tears</span></a><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Dr.
William Frey, a biochemist at Ramsey Medical center in Minneapolis, studied the
composition of different tears and discovered that emotional tears are
comprised of water, salt, and stress hormones. Isn’t it amazing that God
created our bodies with the wonderful ability to rid our physical systems of
these stress chemicals? Tears serve both an emotional and a physical purpose!
Tears are good.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">But
what if visiting the pain again or allowing myself to feel the grief and sorrow
causes emotions or questions that go against what I should believe to be true?
I love the way Priscilla Shirer addresses these concerns. Check this out: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kqxm89y8NIM"><span style="color: #1155cc;">When
You Are Going Through A Lot</span></a><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">So,
my friends, I’m learning that it’s not wrong to feel. It’s actually okay to
cry. Jesus, at the tomb of Lazarus, wept! He didn’t simply shed a couple of
tears and move on. He was deeply moved in spirit and he mourned along with the
other Jews at the graveside. Does this mean that Jesus didn’t believe the truth
of who he was? Was he not solid in his identity? Did he not know what he was
about to do? Absolutely not. He was fully God, yet he chose to be fully human.
And in that moment, he suffered grief of a kind that we are all well acquainted
with.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">When
I’m willing to endure through the grief, rather than escaping it, Jesus can
come to me and comfort me in ways I would never know otherwise. And with that
comfort, I can comfort others in their own struggle. This is the body of
Christ. This is our purpose as a church – not to shore up ourselves to be
stronger in our faith, but to allow Christ to come strengthen our faith in the
struggle.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Grief
is for our good.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">It’s
in the wrestling that we are made stronger.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Weeping
may endure for the night, but great joy comes in the morning!</span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<script src="https://assets.pinterest.com/js/pinit.js" type="text/javascript"></script>Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-15196310548745520142019-01-28T11:11:00.001-05:002020-03-16T06:34:16.209-04:00Don't Go It Alone: How Hiding our Hurts Opens us to Enemy Influence<div class="MsoNormal">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTSg5xGST66FvDxPOr2c-HDbxMO2PrYSNk77QNTURtIDoXgWE_v1fve6cRpzg2gWE8268crkbTH7rAjmNpuBFHm17Fdx8ukn4ShdtkWS3WQNCvbVtHBVYzcuGcdQsBSSIDfZBiYWOrer_4/s1600/sea-2601443_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="909" data-original-width="1600" height="362" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTSg5xGST66FvDxPOr2c-HDbxMO2PrYSNk77QNTURtIDoXgWE_v1fve6cRpzg2gWE8268crkbTH7rAjmNpuBFHm17Fdx8ukn4ShdtkWS3WQNCvbVtHBVYzcuGcdQsBSSIDfZBiYWOrer_4/s640/sea-2601443_1920.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">I feel the threat of attacks rising as the sun tempts to
rise over the horizon. Lies of the enemy just waiting to push buttons of
temptation. Anything he can do to keep me from basking in the glory of the Son
and reflecting that glory to the world around me. When you feel isolated, your
reflection only goes so far. And when one person feels like they aren’t even
reaching another, they ask what’s the point? We were made in the image of God –
in the likeness of the trinity – with an innate need for fellowship. And when
that need goes unmet, we easily distort our perceptions of reality into
contortions similar to mirrors in the funny house. Nothing makes sense, we
don’t know which way is up or which way to turn. Confused and exhausted, it’s
easy to ask, what’s the point? And desire to give up completely.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">But the truth is, we are never alone. Never. For one, He has
said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” He is here. Always. And not
only is he here, but his arms are open wide and he invites us into his loving
embrace. Not condemning. Not chiding. Simply loving, forgiving, encouraging us
on this difficult journey.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFakyGk9IsHcNcvHOTy0PJ6pS7JHwvqYQo_bPc0oAR6PP3IAb-Pj4SvsMQRAJ5vohEHoLrHcIMA2jAZ_DMUjBCvWgsvgYsZ7cFmPm3_NgwTOoagO8eRD3KPNvghHhz3NyvtojdJtDPA6jL/s1600/people-1031169_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-size: large;"><img border="0" data-original-height="981" data-original-width="1600" height="392" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFakyGk9IsHcNcvHOTy0PJ6pS7JHwvqYQo_bPc0oAR6PP3IAb-Pj4SvsMQRAJ5vohEHoLrHcIMA2jAZ_DMUjBCvWgsvgYsZ7cFmPm3_NgwTOoagO8eRD3KPNvghHhz3NyvtojdJtDPA6jL/s640/people-1031169_1920.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Secondly, we are being watched – by someone. Constantly.
Spouse, kids, parents, siblings, social media contacts, the cashier at the
grocery store, the person driving in the car next to you, the barista at
starbucks, the teacher, the student, the patient, the coach, the athlete, the
boss, the employee. And they too, each one of them is longing for connection
whether they realize it or not. Naturally, as humans, we reach toward each
other, even those we don’t know simply to be reminded that we are as human as
they are. Each eye that watches you looks to catch a glimpse that there is
maybe, possibly, more to this life than just surviving. They are looking for
hope. They are looking to you. They are looking to me. No, we are not alone, we
are very much surrounded.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">But our enemy secures our blinders and makes sure we keep
our eyes down so that we don’t make those connections. He wants us to feel alone.
As Lysa Terkeurst says about our enemy, “If he can isolate us, he can influence
us” (It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way, 150). Satan wants his voice to be the
loudest sound we hear. Lies like: <i>You’re
a failure. You’re not good enough. You’re too much. It’s not worth it. Just
give up. </i>His purposes are clearly lined out in scripture. He has come to
steal, kill, and destroy (John 10:10). And what better way to steal our joy,
kill our hope, and destroy our effectiveness than to bring us to a point of
isolation and despair.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">John 10:10 doesn’t stop there. Jesus goes on to say, “But I
have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” Life - made a
living being, coming directly from the breath of God breathed into Adam and has
been breathing into us by the power of his Spirit ever since. We are living
creatures, Imago Dei – made in the likeness of God – and as such we are made
for relationship. But when we hide due to our hurts, our wounds, and our fears,
when we struggle with concern over what others think of our hearts, we isolate
ourselves and open that door to being influenced by the enemy again.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Our Christian culture has convinced us that its most holy to
be joyful (or at least be okay) with the difficulties. James 1 is oft quoted
when trials arise, “Count it all joy.” And yes, that is our obligation –
eventually. The problem arises when we don’t allow time for grief. Jesus wept
over the death of Lazarus (even though he knew the truth of who He was and what
he was about to do.) Jesus again mourned over Jerusalem (though he was about it
rescue all who believed in Him through his sacrifice.) “The Lord is close to
the brokenhearted and saves those who are crusted in spirit” (Psalm 34:18). And
in Romans 12, we are instructed to weep with those who weep. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJbyJZI3Bkuy4K1XOLquT1vxFbYiPMT60_hSne9cMJhfXVuu4PiuZvxKqNheUkif92YjfWd4-Ay-yr9aM-E1OOYq8PyPtTHiEhqWHmx16HW9ZQxoQ-1fq0Glq43hDW0yloBBaLp-EQK2TR/s1600/sad-girl-3007318_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-size: large;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJbyJZI3Bkuy4K1XOLquT1vxFbYiPMT60_hSne9cMJhfXVuu4PiuZvxKqNheUkif92YjfWd4-Ay-yr9aM-E1OOYq8PyPtTHiEhqWHmx16HW9ZQxoQ-1fq0Glq43hDW0yloBBaLp-EQK2TR/s640/sad-girl-3007318_1920.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Life hurts. It’s hard. This sin stained place is suspended
between the fall of Paradise and the not yet fully redeemed. And it’s okay to
grieve that. Grief, is good. Tears heal. Your wound may not look like mine, but that doesn't make it any less significant. Now may be my time for weeping. Now
may be yours. Joy will come in the morning (maybe tomorrow, maybe days from
now.) And the truth is, in the midst of our sorrow, we can still trust that God
is good, that he works all things for good, and that He loves us. Oh, how he
loves us. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">For now, if you’re here (or if you’ve been here, but you’ve
been encouraged to move on too quickly), I encourage you to stay for a while.
Linger. Allow the feelings to surface, and pour out your heart to God – He is
our refuge (Psalm 62:8) and he cares so very much for each little (or big)
thing that has wounded his children’s hearts. Don’t stay alone in your pain.
Share it with a friend. Talk to a counselor if you need to. Close the door to
isolation, and close the door on the enemy’s influence. Jesus is Jehovah Rophe’
– our healer. And he will see to it that your wounds are well tended.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<script src="https://assets.pinterest.com/js/pinit.js" type="text/javascript"></script><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgD1iZyaDA5ilZlvkFtdjsDeX8bVbPckrzi7WqohUWhbQgZRMOW7B0Wk_P2un-KrBP6oP2b3tZW-WEOuNoswyrny97s8yjT-su3Ii78lTFcuF5h1r2VM9yx0baWW7ubkQO7PNHWBgxnz-AC/s1600/friendship-2156171_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-size: large;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgD1iZyaDA5ilZlvkFtdjsDeX8bVbPckrzi7WqohUWhbQgZRMOW7B0Wk_P2un-KrBP6oP2b3tZW-WEOuNoswyrny97s8yjT-su3Ii78lTFcuF5h1r2VM9yx0baWW7ubkQO7PNHWBgxnz-AC/s640/friendship-2156171_1920.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Friends, if someone opens up to you about their pain,
listen, don’t preach. It’s okay for us to grieve. It’s okay for it to hurt. We
can be sorrowful yet joyful in the hope of God’s glory at the same time. It is
possible! Let’s get back to living life to the full like Jesus intended – in true
fellowship with one another!</span><o:p></o:p></div>
Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-9209420329144612322019-01-13T18:28:00.000-05:002019-01-13T18:37:51.394-05:00It's a(nother) BOY!<div class="MsoNormal">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPH_chikVUNEQDUMIml-J6d_gWaw1_31QXL9Z6yHeem_BgcG75hCQ7DBA38FCKt2XV0qLCCg-P8wkh890GGS-Uy3YFpEIK8DPVoTlqOxEYE6H31ZoMK5BTLi5o8YziSHu6mEkXf2iuKAdX/s1600/shoes-3445390_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="425" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPH_chikVUNEQDUMIml-J6d_gWaw1_31QXL9Z6yHeem_BgcG75hCQ7DBA38FCKt2XV0qLCCg-P8wkh890GGS-Uy3YFpEIK8DPVoTlqOxEYE6H31ZoMK5BTLi5o8YziSHu6mEkXf2iuKAdX/s640/shoes-3445390_1920.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">I very much disliked being at church today. From the trite
responses to the sympathetic looks about our news of our 6<sup>th</sup> boy on
the way, to how I felt like I had to justify our decision to be done to some
and defend our decision to continue having kids to this point to others, I
rapidly grew exhausted of the game. I didn’t feel freedom to be completely
honest with anyone I encountered today, and that fact alone makes church so
hard. When I feel like I have to wear a mask around our church family, there’s
just something that seems wrong about that. Family should equate to
authenticity. Unfortunately, many times heavier masks are worn in the church
setting than anywhere outside of it. And we continue to suffer in silence. If
you grieve, you’re not trusting God or being joyful, right?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">So, I’ve started wondering, what would it look like to take
mine off: to decide that I’m rooted enough in who I am in Christ and in where
he has led us in our decisions that it doesn’t matter the response we get, to
be willing to answer honestly when I’m asked about disappointment with another
boy, to take the time to explain the journey Christ has my heart on now, and if
the tears come, allow them to willingly. What I’ve always thought as strength –
holding it all together – is really just fear of man. Choosing rather to be who
I am, where I am, dealing with what I am and being willing to share that no
matter the outcome – that is true strength. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEissQmSoCLMiAAcjvKW8goDreDzhPYGQ_xhZWcLoUGmGtcPd0yOlV5ufoa0TniHtKKfUPyW8edrX-34axsoXPnr7ypVIwM3l1w7jpRqWSEZ8TjjpwY-R9S76iEeL3Muvn3d1eVelMInQ9B2/s1600/Pregnancy+Announcement.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-size: large;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEissQmSoCLMiAAcjvKW8goDreDzhPYGQ_xhZWcLoUGmGtcPd0yOlV5ufoa0TniHtKKfUPyW8edrX-34axsoXPnr7ypVIwM3l1w7jpRqWSEZ8TjjpwY-R9S76iEeL3Muvn3d1eVelMInQ9B2/s640/Pregnancy+Announcement.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">From the moment we found out we were pregnant again, I had a
gut feeling that we were having another boy. That first day, when we saw the
positive test, we easily agreed on his name: Nathaniel Benjamin – Treasured gift
of God, son of my right hand. I joked with friends early on that we were
probably having another boy – that’s our trend, right? Why change a good thing?
I reasoned that I would deal with strong emotions either way – another boy
would be easier. I had everything I needed. I wouldn’t need to re-learn to
parent. And having a girl brought up certain concerns as well – namely her
safety as she grew up in this crazy world. Yes, a boy would just be simpler. But
my heart still leaked longing for some pink in my house, some bows, some
frills, some glitter – something other than sheer male energy, dirt, bugs, sports,
wrestling, “bad-guys”, and things constantly randomly getting broken. Don’t get
me wrong. I love all of those things (well, minus things getting broken). I
love my sons with all of my heart, but a piece of me still longed for that girl
– to be able to share just a piece of my feminine side and have it innately understood
and appreciated. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEguCsBgoLCiQnZCWip4bD5Lft6ivz5L-EMUn6w4bjO11H4UTz6xfJ4oaY2idySL_K7ter_hNWJOVuimYaBMn7rNTl7HUb13-2cCNffvEGRlQMOgNXP3NGN32w27lIYdFH_Ru25ujY1iZSDU/s1600/20181017_KB_0111.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-size: large;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEguCsBgoLCiQnZCWip4bD5Lft6ivz5L-EMUn6w4bjO11H4UTz6xfJ4oaY2idySL_K7ter_hNWJOVuimYaBMn7rNTl7HUb13-2cCNffvEGRlQMOgNXP3NGN32w27lIYdFH_Ru25ujY1iZSDU/s640/20181017_KB_0111.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Twenty weeks came, and with it our ultrasound. We didn’t get
a clear picture of parts, but the tech thought she saw boy parts. I took this
as a definite maybe and began to process the news. But since we weren’t 100%
convinced, we did a blood test to verify her assumption. The results came back
on Thursday – 100% boy! <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgamH3Y2Lw56n9Roz2FBFxRkYQNkRcIFuCWbbtVWvIBqfPynv12ZE56SQLWBZpBLx8xRBmFbxz-9jU8xmaWohkeLjZtvfPnl3w_pYJ2Lts6Qw8Br9TVd45T8_IBeFBQZobDjy2RPg4rZeuA/s1600/000522916_HANNAH_E_NORTON_19831210_20181231093431575.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-size: large;"><img border="0" data-original-height="768" data-original-width="1024" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgamH3Y2Lw56n9Roz2FBFxRkYQNkRcIFuCWbbtVWvIBqfPynv12ZE56SQLWBZpBLx8xRBmFbxz-9jU8xmaWohkeLjZtvfPnl3w_pYJ2Lts6Qw8Br9TVd45T8_IBeFBQZobDjy2RPg4rZeuA/s640/000522916_HANNAH_E_NORTON_19831210_20181231093431575.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">I am so excited that we are adding Nathaniel to our family.
I’m thrilled that I won’t have to buy anything extra, that we won’t wind up
with a double amount of toys in the house, that we are familiar with having
sons, that we can look forward to many challenging adventures in the days to
come, that Jeshua will have a male playmate close in age. But that’s where it
gets complicated – we’ve been seeking God about our family size. We’ve been
seeking wisdom. We’ve emptied ourselves of our own desires and asked God what
his desire is for our family. After much prayer and conversation, we’ve determined
that this is our number: six boys to raise for the glory of God. We long to be
faithful with what he has blessed us with, and we feel like God has other
ministry opportunities on the horizon for our family. With that in mind, six young
men to change the world is God’s best for us. So that means this is it. This is
the end of that subtle longing for a girl. I’m closing the door on this
chapter. People ask if I’d like to try again, and in all honesty, my answer is
no. I don’t feel God calling us to that. Not to mention, we very well might
have another boy anyway if we did try. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">We’ve never “tried” for a girl. We’ve had this many kids
because we felt like God was leading us to have this many. And obviously, he
wanted us to have six sons. I’m okay with that. Yet, this is where my joy turns
bittersweet. The tears well up, fill my eyes and spill over as I consider things
I will never get to enjoy with a biological daughter. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I grieve over never having the opportunity to look in my
child’s eyes and see a tangible piece of myself. (Everyone claims all the boys
look like Jared.) I grieve over the thought of missed tea parties, princess
parties, and playing house with dolls. I grieve over never having the
opportunity to teach a daughter about modesty, being a lady, shaving, periods,
never getting the opportunity to go wedding dress shopping with a girl. I
grieve not being able to welcome my daughter into the role of motherhood
herself, over not having a kindred spirit to share our hearts over coffee or
tea, over missing out on girly shopping in general. I grieve over not having
chick flick nights. I grieve over not having hair to braid or teach about the
deeper beauty that resides on the inside. I grieve over lost sparkles, frills,
and twirling. I grieve over not having a daughter to share my heirlooms with –
dolls and treasures. I grieve over hopes built up over years, clothes
thoughtfully chosen “just in case.” I grieve over not being able to share my
name or my grandmother’s name with a child. I grieve over hopes and dreams that
are being washed away as the tears wash down my cheeks.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Out of all of this, I’ve realized that it’s really okay to
feel this way. It doesn’t mean that I love my son any less. My tears don’t show
some underlying weakness. And even if I hid it all, pushed it away, lived in
logic and told myself to be okay, God wouldn’t be tricked by my mask or façade.
He sees and knows my heart and my very deepest longings – he’s the one who put
them there in the first place. He cares that my heart is breaking. He cares
that I feel there’s a hole that will never be filled. He takes my tears and
places them in a bottle (Psalm 56:8). The Lord is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit (Psalm 34:18). There is a time for grief
(Ecclesiastes 3:4). And now is that time for me. But I can also be encouraged
by the fact that weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning
(Psalm 30:5).</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">In the meantime, friends, if you see tears in my eyes
when I talk about my son, give me grace. If you see me swallow hard when I see
a pretty girly dress, a little girl twirling, or a princess tea party, just
know that it hurts a little. If I hesitate when you ask if I’m disappointed,
just know that there’s so much more to the story. And if I cry, just give me a
hug. I’ll be okay. I know God’s got this. I trust him. And in the meantime, I
will continue to pour out my heart to him – God is my refuge (Psalm 62:8). <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieUxeNJkw-86MLYbsznqicPtoz6l2JTJUsXXiZthCfm6VWkfYftwGtFpYOn9GZhc8t9HvCvaANJcLlsODqP6o_fWHYiu_LYJcKC0IxkzLJUFZ-fZ_c9E50cNSqVSibSsRUryOXuZ3J6vkj/s1600/20181017_KB_0081.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-size: large;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieUxeNJkw-86MLYbsznqicPtoz6l2JTJUsXXiZthCfm6VWkfYftwGtFpYOn9GZhc8t9HvCvaANJcLlsODqP6o_fWHYiu_LYJcKC0IxkzLJUFZ-fZ_c9E50cNSqVSibSsRUryOXuZ3J6vkj/s640/20181017_KB_0081.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
<br />
<script src="https://assets.pinterest.com/js/pinit.js" type="text/javascript"></script>Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-79392643821268468122018-12-29T15:32:00.000-05:002018-12-29T15:35:26.774-05:00How to Walk Worthy in 2019<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhWGO-44qwD4O3AZyd21sb5O5meYrtxQ2XA8tnRxD4e3I2B5zuflb0oj29vSxbjRXa96YkKheNUUAdKp3UUpyhUeiuQDklrdWNHh9juno7fWeG24ID4o_A7I8lCnFYxLlDRCT0ptusMt_0/s1600/standing-336554_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1070" data-original-width="1600" height="425" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhWGO-44qwD4O3AZyd21sb5O5meYrtxQ2XA8tnRxD4e3I2B5zuflb0oj29vSxbjRXa96YkKheNUUAdKp3UUpyhUeiuQDklrdWNHh9juno7fWeG24ID4o_A7I8lCnFYxLlDRCT0ptusMt_0/s640/standing-336554_1920.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">I feel something inside me changing. I’m not sure what it is
or what it will look like yet. But I want to share it – to help others find the
same abundant life. This word study that I have been looking into – “peripateo axios”
(Walk Worthy Eph. 4:1, Colossians 1:10, 1 Thessalonians 2:12). Circumferential
and fully encompassing of every area of life with a center axis point at which
everything else rotates. So, to put that in English: each area of my life
(physical, emotional, spiritual, social, mental, hormonal, etc.) finds its
anchor point in the person and work of Christ and in the purpose of bringing
him glory by being intimately connected to him in each and every moment.
Decisions are made, actions carried out, fruit produced in the strength of and
for the glory of God alone. Optimal health for his glory. Optimal growth for
his glory. Optimal outreach for his glory. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">It would be easy to hold off on the “start” of this journey
until I can really lose weight – I’m halfway through pregnancy, so that’s not
happening anytime soon. Or part of me could easily fall into self-striving in
an attempt to find this ideal in every area of life. But that’s not what my
heart is being summoned to at this point. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">In the old Testament, believers in the promise and followers
of the Torah were instructed to give a tenth (a tithe) of their first fruits
toward the growth and development of the temple. Many today, still follow that
principle in their finances, but what would it look like to take that a step
further? We are told that our bodies are now temples of the Holy Spirit (1
Corinthians 6:19). What would it look like to invest 10% of our time, energy,
and focus each week to provide for the growth and development of where the Holy
Spirit resides? We are the church – are we at optimal performance for the glory
of God? Is my body, mind, and heart functioning at a point that I can fulfill
the will of God? That’s the whole purpose of walking worthy – that we may be fully
pleasing to Him in every way. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">In my current state, can I be the wife or mother God has
called me to be? In my management of stress, nutrition, fitness and rest am I
living in such a way as to optimize time, energy, and focus for the things of
God or am I more likely to be self-indulgent in my food, activities, and entertainment
choices? Just some questions I’m pondering as we approach this new year. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">I want 2019 to be different. I want to start now - taking
steps toward finding that deeper communication with the Holy Spirit on a moment
by moment basis so that whether I eat or drink or whatever I do, it can all be
done for the glory of God.</span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Wanna join me? A journey like this will look different for
each person, but I’d love to share mine and hear what God is teaching you as you
venture down this road of walking worthy of the Lord.</span> </span></div>
Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-48159959366000597382018-08-31T11:36:00.001-04:002018-12-29T15:23:58.348-05:00When the Scale Doesn't Move, Eat a Cookie<div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I looked down at the scale; my lips curled into a frown. I had my baby 5 weeks ago, and I was barely down 7 pounds. Sighing deeply, I moved to the bookshelf and retrieved the diet book. </span><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Guess it’s time to pull up my big girl pants - literally - and do this.</span><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> I flipped through the pages and found the information I was looking for - low carb cleanse. It had worked before, so I purposed to stock my pantry and fridge with the required items and follow the plan. I couldn’t wait to see the pounds melt off. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Five days later, I skipped to the scale expecting to see big results. As the number appeared, my mouth dropped in horror. What was wrong with this thing? It hadn’t budged! </span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcAxNbE_jHgFaU0yHe4odMqf6bRucjghjR2yjrK2DI3nxjWEAOB7Ss41Y7zEVLAMuS_8u84_qHYHfbmDp-bTfcrWnqITO9g5CweHu_ucPtCq5acXDOFhArBCoM8N9XD4_O2v8zbLkgvkLa/s1600/dine-2081099_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcAxNbE_jHgFaU0yHe4odMqf6bRucjghjR2yjrK2DI3nxjWEAOB7Ss41Y7zEVLAMuS_8u84_qHYHfbmDp-bTfcrWnqITO9g5CweHu_ucPtCq5acXDOFhArBCoM8N9XD4_O2v8zbLkgvkLa/s640/dine-2081099_1920.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">A friend had volunteered to bring us dinner that night. As the food came in and my house filled with the smells of warm comfort, my stomach rumbled in desire. It had been a long day, and I was hungry - really hungry. I thanked my friend and unpacked hot chicken pot pie, bread sticks, salad, and just-out-of-the-oven chocolate chip cookies. </span><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Ohhh! Chocolate chip - my favorite!</span><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> My mouth watered, but I stood there dumbfounded. Of all this glorious dinner, only the salad fit my low carb plan. I felt the tears fill my eyes as I stared at the wafting steam from the dishes. What was I going to do? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I retreated to my room where I cried angry. </span><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">God, this diet has worked before. Why isn’t it working this time? I’m trying to be so faithful, but I’m so hungry! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I started to weigh my options. I could pitch the whole thing and just enjoy myself. But where was the self-control in that? I could stick with my diet and just eat a salad; but I knew that wouldn’t fill my stomach making me even more emotional, and it wouldn’t give me the calories I desperately needed in order to feed my baby. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-size: large;">My Body, His Temple</span></span></h3>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; white-space: pre-wrap;">As I sat there, 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 came to mind. “Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.”</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">If my body is the temple of the almighty God, then he must know exactly what my body needs at each given moment. Maybe I should ask him what he thinks?</span><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> So that’s what I did. Over the course of the next half hour or so, my loving Father led my heart to several passages of Scripture and began a paradigm shift that would change my life.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“‘All things are lawful for me,’ but not all things are helpful. ‘All things are lawful for me,’ but I will not be dominated by anything’" (1 Corinthians 6:13). </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The enticing food sitting on my kitchen counter was not bad, wrong, or unlawful for me to consume. The question I had to consider was whether it would be helpful or controlling in that moment.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I began to ponder the options I had laid before myself. If I threw up my hands and indulged my every appetite, the very food that I was consuming would be taking mastery over me. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“I am the LORD your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of slavery. You shall have no other gods before me” (Exodus 20:2-3).</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">In that moment, my eyes were opened to the truth. If it was possible for food to become an idol in my life, could it be that - even in my desire to be healthy and do things right - my diet could also become a little “g” god in my life? Maybe my diet and my desire for health wasn’t exactly aligned with God’s design for my body.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“For everything God created is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving, because it is consecrated by the word of God and prayer” (1 Timothy 4:4-5).</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">If I chose not to eat any of the food provided because of my fear (fear of calories, the scale, messing up the diet, etc.), I was revealing the pride and ingratitude of my heart. And my well meaning diet was pushing me further away from the woman God wanted me to be.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">My eyes began to clear as I realized my struggle wasn’t ultimately food. The issue at hand wasn’t even what the scale read at the end of the day. The question I had to ask myself was that of my heart’s posture. Who or what was I bowing to? My appetites? My diet? Some idea of what I should look like?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">All those times in the past that I stressed myself out because of the rules of a diet or how fast the weight was (or was not) coming off, I was bowing to those things. The diet and the scale - both becoming my master. I was worshiping them before I was worshiping God.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Thank you God, for creating my body. I’m sorry I haven’t been treating it like your temple. I’m sorry I’ve had my own ideas of what I should look like, how I should eat or what I should weigh. I’m sorry I’ve never asked you. Could you give me wisdom? You promise it when I ask</span><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> (James 1:5). </span><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Give me your vision for my physical body. Show me how to take care of this temple for your glory!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-size: large;">Food for the Stomach and Soul</span></span></h3>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">As I returned to the table, new peace and joy flooded my heart. I did eat a hearty salad and a modest portion of the pot pie. And as I reached for a cookie, I felt God smile. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I returned to my room with that one cookie, sat on my bed, lifted it toward my face and inhaled deeply. </span><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Thank you, God for the cow that gave the milk that made the cream for the butter in this cookie. Thank you God for the chicken that laid the egg that was put in this cookie. Thank you God for the field that grew the wheat that produced the flour that is in this cookie. Thank you God for cocoa beans that got processed into chocolate chips that flavor this cookie.</span><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> </span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjY7BABP5r2a3TPfd_iF2fa0LxXF9FaOakXxmuGAHsSJ1f_VgRN9Ih9uTmPTDZLasP5svpDf0BpqiUy2ugUmWxS4445jzk-VtSYr7QAQwjKZWAf55eHqlCH7ayqVbzgCgLMoxU2VCugOoN8/s1600/baked-3612406_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: medium; font-weight: 400; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center; white-space: normal;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1085" data-original-width="1600" height="432" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjY7BABP5r2a3TPfd_iF2fa0LxXF9FaOakXxmuGAHsSJ1f_VgRN9Ih9uTmPTDZLasP5svpDf0BpqiUy2ugUmWxS4445jzk-VtSYr7QAQwjKZWAf55eHqlCH7ayqVbzgCgLMoxU2VCugOoN8/s640/baked-3612406_1920.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-weight: 700; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-size: large;">Eating the Cookie</span></span></h3>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">That chocolate chip cookie was probably pretty ordinary. Nothing spectacular went into that recipe. But that chocolate chip cookie - when I received it with a heart of gratitude - was the most delightful cookie I had ever eaten!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Sometimes glorifying God in my body is eating the cookie in gratitude. Other times, it is allowing the Holy Spirit to produce his self-control in my life and leaving the cookie on the tray. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Learning to bow to God alone is not a one-size-fits-all method. As I’ve learned to treat my body as God’s temple, I’ve seen that what is best for me may not be what is best for my friend. It’s really all about learning to walk in step with Him. Moment by moment. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">May God be glorified in us as we live (and eat) for Him!</span></div>
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This post was originally published on <a href="https://www.reviveourhearts.com/true-woman/blog/when-scale-doesnt-budge/" target="_blank">True Woman Blog</a>.<br />
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<script src="https://assets.pinterest.com/js/pinit.js" type="text/javascript"></script>Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-19932207634199212152017-01-25T06:29:00.002-05:002018-08-06T17:41:14.529-04:00Feeling Better, Feeling Worse (How women's events really make us feel!)<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Have you ever noticed
when you’re in a room full of women, everyone seems to be sizing up everyone
else? Some women enter confidently, some approach with questions, and others
slip in and slide into the corner unnoticed. The bold flaunt airs (whether
overtly or subtly) while the insecure hope no one notices their inadequacies.
Why do we as woman play this constant comparison game? <i>She has it all
together, so I must not measure up in some way.</i> And when someone else is
struggling, it just makes us feel all the better about ourselves</span><span style="color: #980000; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">We take extra time
before going to meet with ladies to fix our hair, our clothes, our kids, our
face, our attitudes.<i> What mask do I need to wear today in order to feel good
about myself? I wonder how many compliments I will get today (about my outfit,
my kids, or the dish that I cooked)?</i> We look for those don’t we? We walk
away with a count, and if we didn’t get enough we try to change something for
the next time so that our “approval meter” is filled.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Call it what you may,
competing, comparing, judging, insecurity, longing – it all boils right back
down to idolatry. God has been showing me recently that my competitive nature,
my judgmental heart, my inclination to desire the applause of men, is really
rooted in a desire to be worshiped. What is this tendency to desire the praise
of men? Where does it come from? And what can I do about it? Because in my
deepest heart, I long to worship and glorify God alone!</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">In 1 Corinthians chapter
4, Paul addresses the judgmental attitudes of the Corinthians. He asks three
rather rhetorical questions: For who sees anything different in you? What do
you have that you did not receive? </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">And if you did receive
it, why do you boast as though you did not?</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Background</span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The Corinthian Church
was primarily an outcropping of Paul’s ministry. After having left the region,
he began to hear of divisions and sins that began creeping into the Church
body. The country of Corinth was well-to-do – located on an isthmus between two
bodies of water and two masses of land, it was a crossroads for the Grecian
culture. The city was fed by a constant water supply from a natural spring,
“protected by” the patron saint of seamen, “blessed by” the goddess of love,
booming economically, and for all intents and purposes was rich, well
established, and deeply rooted in sin culture. Some of their falling back into
old practices was ignorance, yet some of it was familiarity. (How often I am
here – self focus is natural…) Paul found out that they were esteeming certain
teachers over and above others, and they had the mentality that they had
already arrived at their “kingdom.” So he admonishes their judging hearts,
emphasizes that which is not seen (the hidden things in darkness that will be
exposed by the light), and asks them the three questions to really get them
thinking about their judgmental attitudes in a truthful way!</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Question #1</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> - 1 Corinthians 4:7 – “For who sees anything
different in you?”</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Question #2</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> - 1 Corinthians 4:7 “What do you have that you
did not receive?”</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Question #3</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> - 1 Corinthians 4:7 – “And if you did receive
it, why do you boast as though you did not?”</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Question #1 – 1
Corinthians 4:7 – “For who sees anything different in you?”</span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I found my answers to this question ironic. As
I think back to my Jr. High and High School days, and even some in college, I
found myself frequently trying to look like, act like, and talk like those kids
that I thought were popular or well liked. I wanted the same approval they had.
I wanted to “fit in.” The crazy thing about this is that I wanted to fit in so that
I could stand out. My current struggle, however, is more defined: I want
something unique to offer the world around me – something that no one else can.
I want to be the best at one thing. Even if it’s a small thing, I want to be
approved, I want to win – I want to be the best so that I can feel people
giving me worth. (AKA: Giving me worship)</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Paul gives us a reality
check in this passage. "Therefore, judge nothing before the appointed
time, wait until the Lord comes, He will bring to light what is hidden in
darkness and will expose the motives of the heart. At that time, each will
receive their praise from God” (1 Corinthians 4:5). I have no right to judge
the women around me because I can neither see nor know their hearts. And when
we start talking about hearts, ultimately, we all wind up on a level playing
field from God’s view. Romans 3:23 states that all have sinned, and James 2:10
goes on to explain that even if we keep the law in every way except one, we are
still guilty of breaking the entirety of the law. Being separated from God due
to sin, we are all deserving of death. Praise be to God that the death he died,
he died to sin, once for ALL (Romans 6:10).</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Once you were alienated
from God and were enemies in your minds because of your evil behavior, but now
Christ has reconciled you to himself through death to present you Holy in His
sight, without blemish, and free from accusation. (Colossians 1:21-22)</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">So, Christ, who sees the
heart, knows the thoughts, see our past, our present, and our future as the
Great I AM, sees me, you, and our sisters in Christ as equals. Made in His
image we sinned and fell short. We deserved death, and he came in order to
reconcile us back to himself. Now, through His blood, we are holy. I am holy.
You are holy, and we owe all worship to our Savior. In God’s eyes, we are
saved, rescued, redeemed, clothed in the righteousness of his son, worthy,
holy, and approved! When our vision begins to clear, and we can see ourselves
and our sisters for who we really are, the comparison games can all step aside.
We all reside on a level playing field!</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The next two questions
seem to address one of two perceptions we as women have of ourselves in
relation to others: superiority or inferiority.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Question #2 - 1
Corinthians 4:7 “What do you have that you did not receive?” (Superiority)</span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Here, Paul is addressing
believers here who are stuck in the pride of self-made righteousness. The
“dos.” Many of the Corinthian believers resorted to a mentality of working hard
and receiving all the glory for their achievements – how often I find myself
here too! Throughout my growing up years, I looked at the Fruit of the Spirit
as actions that I needed to work harder at so that I could be more like God. <i>If
only I could make myself more patient, more kind, more joyful, more
self-controlled, if I could just work hard enough, maybe I could finally be a
“good Christian girl.”</i></span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">But it doesn’t work that
way. Ephesians 2:8-9 tells us that our salvation is through grace, not by works
that we have done – <u>so that we cannot boast!</u><i> </i>Furthermore, if we
look at the idea of a fruit producing plant, we see that it must be supported
and fed by something (the roots). A plant can never bear fruit of its own
effort or desire, but must remain connected to the main vine/root system.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">When I think I have the
power to produce my own fruit, it’s pride. I don’t like that word. I don’t like
the people it compares me to – the sons of Noah at the tower of Babel, Ahab,
the rich young ruler, the prodigal son’s brother. Pride is anything that has I
at the center of it. Look what I have done, what my hands have made, the weight
I lost, the kids I have, the dish I made, the gift I gave. It’s all about me,
me, me.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Proverbs tells us that
pride brings a man low and that it is an abomination to the Lord. 1 Peter 5:5 –
God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble. Christ Himself, even
though equal with God in all respects, did not take advantage of that equality,
but humbled himself and became a servant – thinking of others before he thought
of himself. (Phil. 2)</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">When my thinking about
all that I have been given is redeemed, I can see myself in light of Christ and
then learn to walk in humility as Christ did – no longer taking pride in
something I did not even accomplish for myself, but learning to see myself in
sober judgment and thinking of others as more important than myself, in turn,
directing all worship back to God, to whom it is due!</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Question #3 - 1
Corinthians 4:7 – “And if you did receive it, why do you boast as though you
did not?” (Inferiority)</span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Here we see the pendulum
swing is to the other extreme – the stereotypical Eeyore – “woe is me, I’m not
gifted like anyone else, how could I ever be that good?” Sometimes, this
mentality is a result of years of wounds, sometime it is misinformation,
sometime it is lack of knowledge, and sometimes I swing to this side when once
again, I am “trying” to humble myself – not realizing that this false humility
puts me in the same place as my pride.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">True humility is knowing
who God is, knowing who you are, and knowing where they each properly belong. I
think many Christians get the idea that humility is an Eeyore sort of
mentality. Unfortunately, this “woe is me” mentality is also pride in its own
light – inward self-focus. “I” is once again at the center. When I find myself
in this position, I’m still longing for my own worship, rather than turning my
eyes toward Christ. I just get the feeling that it could never happen – but
that doesn’t mean it’s not still what I am looking for.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Back to Reality</span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Paul is urging the
Corinthians to seek, know, understand, and admit all that they have been given.
He goes on to say: Already you have all you want. (They had direct access to
God, they had been given salvation, blessed with the holy Spirit, rescued,
redeemed, reconciled) Already you have become rich. (They were blessed with
every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, they were co-heirs with Christ.)
You have become kings. (They were royalty, a chosen generation, a royal people
– a people belonging to God).</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Final Thoughts</span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Our judgmental attitudes
will only disappear when we begin to humble ourselves as Jesus did. When we can
look at the people we interact with and see that we all start on level playing
fields, when we understand that our righteous standing in God’s eyes does not
depend on our own works, and when we grasp the reality of how blessed we are in
Christ, we too will be able to walk as Jesus walked – in humble surrender and
in the Spirit’s power.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Lord, give us your grace
and strength to uproot deep seeded pride in our lives and to walk in light of
who we are because of your grace and how you want to use us to impact the
world!</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-59477704615862454512016-08-02T15:57:00.001-04:002016-08-02T15:57:42.504-04:00To the Mom with the Puking Kid in the CFA Bathroom<script src="https://assets.pinterest.com/js/pinit.js" type="text/javascript"></script>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Hi Friend! Can I call you friend? After all, we are all part
of the same enormous family. To say I was a bit surprised when you rushed
through the door cradling your daughter in your arms would be an accurate statement.
But appalled? No. Bothered? Nope, not even really that. Though I’m sure the
same mortified look that graced your face would have been plastered on my own
as well had I been in your shoes last night. </span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmYneXCpN7els9inHnHB-zQlKJOrca3-uTBqpc9cvMWGctT0H8EjUa_EColrAAoPQjI1oOymZjRmqnTayGPQfwHak7pLnHgLfvLC4aztVmAfg00USqoFG6jdaB8ljSCnH-Q9IHVSGqdVat/s1600/water-tap-1269763_1280.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="263" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmYneXCpN7els9inHnHB-zQlKJOrca3-uTBqpc9cvMWGctT0H8EjUa_EColrAAoPQjI1oOymZjRmqnTayGPQfwHak7pLnHgLfvLC4aztVmAfg00USqoFG6jdaB8ljSCnH-Q9IHVSGqdVat/s400/water-tap-1269763_1280.jpg" width="400" /></a><br /></div>
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">But that’s how things are, aren’t they? When our own child does
something that goes against the social norm – whether it’s puking in a restaurant,
or throwing a tantrum in the middle of the grocery store – We look around
wondering what the old man must think of us now, or how the other mom in the
bathroom </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><span style="font-family: "calibri";"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "calibri";">must be chiding us for bringing
our sick child out in public, and we feel just awful for what we put the
employees through (whether cleaning up remnants of lunch or the shattered glass
spaghetti sauce jar that the one year old threw to the ground – yes, that
happened to me). And these moments are hard. Really hard! But they happen. Life
happens. And we get caught in the middle of it sometimes. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";">I’m so sorry for any rude comments that came your way as a
result of last night. To be honest, I’m glad for your sake it was at
Chick-fil-A and not another restaurant as the grace of the employees covers
nearly any offense in that place. I’m sorry if there were other customers that
were more concerned about their own comfort than in assisting a struggling
momma in her moment of need. I assure you, this wasn’t your fault.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";">As you think back over the events and decisions of your day,
second guessing where you went wrong and wishing so desperately that you could
go back and just change one thing to undo the embarrassment of the evening, don’t
beat yourself up. There’s no way you could have known your daughter wasn’t up
for a chicken sandwich. You made your decisions based on the information you
had at the time. You did your best. You’re still a good momma!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Sometimes, we as women like to look at the mommas around us,
convinced that they must have it all together – never aware that their
insecurities run as deep as ours. And isn’t that why we judge and condemn one
another anyhow? It makes us feel better to make someone else feel worse. It
makes us feel bigger to make someone else feel smaller. I guarantee you that no
mother makes it through life without embarrassment, frustration, and regret.
Not one! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";">I’m proud of you, friend. The way you handled yourself, the
way your cared for your daughter – I saw how you loved her. Thank you for not
chiding or making her feel guilty for something she couldn’t control. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";">So when you think back to last night and rushing down the
aisle to the bathroom, do me a favor, k? Give yourself a little grace! I’m
willing to. And the next time you see me with a puking kid in the bathroom, you
can pass it back my way.</span></div>
Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-56304514263057959362016-07-09T16:23:00.000-04:002016-07-09T16:23:49.394-04:00Body Image and the Fear of God<div class="MsoNormal">
What does the fear of God have to do with my body image
anyhow? I rolled the question around my mind and wondered if that really was
the key to the struggle that had been weighing on my mind so heavily recently. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
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Ever since my fourth little boy was born, I’ve bemoaned the
ways my body has morphed into someone I don’t even recognize any longer. Pants
are the worst! Finding a pair that is both modest and flattering seems nearly
impossible. And who has money to buy a totally new wardrobe anyhow? Not to
mention, I wasn’t about to spend money on clothing that was a size larger! <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The struggle was real! After my third boy, I had a paradigm
shift in my thinking about food. For so long, I had lived with the mentality of
fad diets and/or depriving my body in order to lose weight. Not only did I
realize that this was wreaking havoc on my metabolism, but it wasn’t glorifying
God with my body. And that’s what I was called to – 1 Corinthians 6:19 – your body
is a temple of the Holy Spirit, therefore, honor God with your body. So I
studied nutrition (extensively); I learned what God created my body to consume,
my needs, and how to enjoy the foods God provided without guilt! I lost weight –
lots. I also learned to move my body like it was meant to move, to rest, and to
manage stress in a Spirit filled way. Viva Gloria – living the glorious life.
Walking in the Spirit. It was beautiful!<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Why wasn’t the weight coming off this time? I was so
frustrated. I know that my stress level was higher. I was getting less sleep.
And I was nursing an injury that was limiting my ability to move like I wanted
to. But still – I wanted more. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The truth is (and it’s nasty): I wanted people to notice
again. I wanted the compliments. And I wanted to feel good about myself. PRIDE.
Yep. That’s what it is. I was at the center of my thinking. How quickly right
motive morph into selfish desires. I started out with the purpose of walking in
the Spirit and honoring God, I slide down the slope of self-image sin. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I was more concerned about what my friend was going to say
the next time she saw me than how God could use me to minister to her heart. <br /><br /><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My heart had become ugly. Workouts took priority (for a
while) over my time with God and my time with my sons and cost me energy
reserves that both were more worthy of. I would eat healthy (for a time) until
I got emotional and needed a quick chocolate fix or something more. Eventually,
I gave way to eating whatever I felt like again (and this definitely didn’t
help the body image cycle). <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So I’ve experienced both sides of this coin. . . really
walking in step with God and being in tune with His Spirit and seeing results,
morphing into prideful body image, self-made ideals of weight loss, and shame
when results didn’t happen (and easily falling back into an “I don’t care”
mentality). –Maybe there’s more than two sides of this coin. ;)<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I never really thought I had an issue with fear of man when
it came to my body. I mean, I wasn’t really scared of how other people saw me.
I’ve never been really hurt by comments or teasing. But I see now that fear
doesn’t have to mean fear in a way I understand it. When I put more value on
how others perceive me and less on what God sees in my heart at that moment
(whether it is concern for another woman or the third cookie I want to put in
my mouth), I am fearing man more than I fear God. <o:p></o:p></div>
<script src="https://assets.pinterest.com/js/pinit.js" type="text/javascript"></script><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Father, teach me to fear you only with my body – what I eat,
how I sleep, how I move, and how I relate to those around me. And may I live
this glorious life that you’ve prepared for me – for your glory alone!<o:p></o:p></div>
Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7152851744864045287.post-28665969410358071292016-05-06T04:00:00.000-04:002016-05-06T04:00:00.358-04:00To Nannah, on Her Birthday: What I Remember and What I Learned<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
Dear Nannah,<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br />
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Happy first birthday in heaven. I didn’t anticipate that you
wouldn’t be spending this one with us, though I expect that heaven throws
better parties that we ever could. I wanted to take a few minutes to write you
this birthday and express how grateful I am for your life and your impact on
mine. I only regret I never took the opportunity to do this while you were
here. <br />
<br />
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I struggle to find the right words to express the depths of
my love and appreciation for your life. And in some ways, it would be easier
emotionally to stay busy today and now allow my heart to linger. The memories,
precious, cherished, yet hard to revisit since you are no longer here to share
them with. The lessons you taught me over the 31 years that I knew you were invaluable
in shaping who I am today. You truly were a woman who left a legacy!<br />
<br />
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
What I remember and cherish . . . <o:p></o:p></div>
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<ul>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Yearly tree trimming parties at your house,
antique ornaments, shortbread cookies, and how you showed such grace when I
broke one of your glass bells.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Yearly trips to the mall to buy Easter shoes to
go with our Easter dresses – and they had to be white! </span><span style="font-family: "wingdings"; text-indent: -0.25in;">J</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">How you cooked big dinners on Sunday afternoons
because you relished the time with family.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Dancing silly to Richard Simmons or Jazzercise
in your living room while you kept up until you got tired then sat down on the
couch to watch.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;"> </span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">How you taught me to tenderly care for African
Violets – your favorite flowers.</span></li>
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<ul>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Dressing up as a ballerina and dancing shows for
you where you always praised and applauded.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">My four-year-old Disney vacation with you,
Mickey mouse ice cream all over my face, a giant lightbulb on the ship, and how
we woke up before dawn to take pictures of the sunrise.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Tiddlywinks tournaments</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">How you dreamed of what your yard and your creek
could be a place of rest, and your random chair set down the steep hill by the
brook. I’m sorry you never saw that dream realized!</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Bedtime snacks and Brother Rabbit stories!</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Jergens lotion on our hands and bactine for bug
bites.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Your presence at our milestones – how you never
missed a piano recital, gymnastics meet, or Awana awards.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Walking at the mall with your friends.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Awana games and the night you broke your wrist
jumping over a ball in dodge ball.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">The Fox Theater for Little Women and several
times to see the Nutcracker.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Yearly Christmas ornaments.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Your “catnaps” during movies.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Another Disney trip where it rained all day, you
bought Rachel and I yellow ponchos and rubbed our cold, wet feet warm once we
got back to the hotel.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Weathering the storm at St. George’s Island.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">How you braved our sled track that first winter
in Michigan.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Stories of Walter Sr. and how you cried when I
found “your song.”</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Thanksgivings in Kentucky at the hotel and
annual “surprise parties” that we always knew were coming.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">How you never forgot a birthday or anniversary –
you loved celebrating people!</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Coca-Cola cake.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">How you surprised me by flying up for my college
graduation.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">How you fell in love with Jared from the start.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Your beauty and serenity on my wedding day.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">How you proudly carried your brag book of your
grandchildren.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">How you patiently explained to two-year-old Eli
how your watch worked when he asked.</span></li>
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<ul>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">- How you made Kaleb giggle.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">The rapid, deep connection you made with Gabriel
on our last trip to see you.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Your faithfulness in praying for me.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">How you always cried when we left, but tried to
cover it up.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">How Gabriel walked you back to your car, and
somehow I knew that was the last time we would see you.</span></li>
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Your life has ingrained principles into mine. You taught me
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<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Love covers a multitude of sins. When you were
offended, you never took it personally, and you let things go very quickly. You
knew that God loved you, and you offered that same love and grace to both your
family and your friends.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">The art of distraction. When my kids would
squabble, you would quickly separate them and move on to something new.
Changing the subject was an art form. </span><span style="font-family: "wingdings"; text-indent: -0.25in;">J</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">A gentle answer turns away wrath. I hold no
memories of you ever raising your voice. Your tone was one of gentleness and
peace.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Prayer is powerful and changes things. You
prayed Ephesians 3:14-18 for your children and grandchildren daily. You told
me. And I never doubted it as I saw the fruit of this prayer bud and flourish
in my and my siblings lives.</span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">-</span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">
</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Giving is better than receiving. You servants
heart and love for giving were evident from when you would argue over who was
covering the dinner bill or serving by washing dishes or prepping food because
you couldn’t stand not to be involved. Thank you for setting the example of
servanthood!</span></li>
</ul>
<span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Nannah, I would give anything to hug you one more time. I am
beyond grateful that God blessed me with a woman as wonderful as you for my
grandmother. And well, I guess since I couldn’t say “grandmother” as a toddler “Nannah”
had to do. And I have to say, it fit you well.</span><!--[if !supportLists]--><o:p></o:p><br />
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Thank you for loving so well. Thank you for living so well.
Thank you for being all of the woman God called you to be. I pray that I too
may leave a legacy for generations to come.<br />
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Lovingly,<o:p></o:p></div>
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Hannah Elizabeth</div>
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Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00349134170793899261noreply@blogger.com0